7 People reveal the weirdest messages they've ever found in a fortune cookie

7 People reveal the weirdest messages they've ever found in a fortune cookie

Fortune cookies (whether they actually taste good or not) are one of the best things about ordering Chinese food. Who doesn't get a little bit excited about what their future could have in store? Unfortunately, not every fortune turns out to be as helpful or as optimistic as we'd like.

From odd vocabulary lessons to random musings about the universe, we've rounded up the funniest fortunes from Twitter.

1. Self-aware

We are closer to a sausage party scenario than we know.

2. Mom

Why does this sound like my mom?

3. Lazy ass cookie

Fortune cookies have one job, but even they get lazy sometimes.

4. Kinky

This one seems to have taken a page from Fifty Shades of Grey.

5. Gross

Probably worse than being told I'll die next week.

6. Too late

Telling people to avoid cookies is counterproductive, coming from a cookie.

7. Aunty cookie

This one sounds like a nagging relative again. Who wants to be shamed by their fortune.

If anything this hasn't made me pessimistic, just incredibly desperate for some Chinese.