Here are the 9 reasons you should never sleep naked
When you're growing up, the only bedtime routine you have any exposure to is your family's, so you take that to be the norm. But, as you start to get older, you might stay with a friend for a sleepover and find that their family leave the hall lights on at night, or close their bedroom doors, or change their pillowcases on a weirdly frequent basis.
Then, when you reach adulthood, you start to have other kinds of sleepovers, at which point you realize that some people like to sleep naked, and others don't.
Obviously, everybody has a personal preference on this - but I'm here to give you nine reasons on why you should ditch the naked napping and get yourself a cozy pair of jim-jams.
1. Pajamas are awesome
They're like bedtime fancy dress. You can go smart with your PJs - maybe a silky nightgown or smart cotton set - or completely casual - think Pokemon branded pajama pants or a baggy shirt you accidentally ordered in a size three times too big for you. And why miss out on an opportunity to wear something like that just so you can flash your butt?
2. Baby, it's cold outside
If you're in the northern hemisphere right now, you might have noticed the weather becoming a little chilly recently. You know what helps with that? Pajamas. Get yourself a pair of thick pants and a good quality top, et voila, you'll be as snug as a bug in a rug. You'll find them particularly useful when you inevitably have to get up and pee at four am after the heating has gone off.
3. Not everyone knocks
There's a good chance that a lot of the people reading this live alone - in which case, do what you want. However, for those of us who cohabit with roommates or family, you may want to invest in some PJs to avoid inadvertently exposing yourself to your dad when he barges in late at night after a few pints.
4. What if you have to evacuate?
Ok, so this is obviously incredibly unlikely to happen, and I hope nobody reading this ever has to experience it... but what if there's a fire or something? Or you hear a suspicious noise outside the house? Or your building suddenly has to evacuate for some other reason? You don't want to be standing there in your birthday suit while everything is going down.
5. You don't want butt on your sheets
I don't want to question your personal hygiene or anything, but do you really want to sleep somewhere that had your naked butt and genitals all over it the night before? Especially if you're one of those wriggly sleepers. You could end up with your face pressed against the bit that your bare behind was on just 24 hours previously.
6. You don't want sweat on your sheets
Much like the above point, you don't really want to be sleeping in a pool of stale sweat. Human beings lose about a third of a pint of sweat during the night, and that all accumulates in those Egyptian cotton sheets of yours. Plus, let's be real, you'd change your pajamas much more often than your sheets, so your nighttime wear won't suffer too much.
7. The postman won't appreciate it
Hey, remember you've got that Amazon package coming tomorrow? Of course you don't! So you're going to sleep in like a fool and then get woken up by a knock at the door just after nine o'clock. At which point, you're left with a few choices: make the naked dash, make a semi-naked dash with a towel, or rush to sling on some jeans and a hoodie before the delivery man gives up and goes home. You know how you could avoid that? Oh yeah, pajamas.
8. It's one more way to be festive
You know how, at this time of year, stores release seasonal versions of everyday items? So you get Christmas jumpers, Christmas foods, and Christmas home items like candles and soaps and stuff. Well, you also get - you guessed it - CHRISTMAS PAJAMAS. And nothing shows more festive cheer than bouncing out of bed on December 25th covered head-to-toe in reindeer and snowmen.
9. For the nostalgia
I'm an adult now. I accept that. But that doesn't mean I have to give up eating fun breakfast cereal or getting excited about going to theme parks. And it doesn't mean I have to give up my precious jammies, either. You can take my free bus pass and my cheap movie tickets, but, damn it, you can't take my baggy night shirt.
Look, guys, I'm not going to tell you how to live your lives. If you want to let it all hang out as you catch some Zs, you're absolutely more than welcome to. All I'm saying is that PJs bring the sleeping experience to the next level, and you're definitely missing out.