Guy's hilarious and heartfelt breakup letter to his gym is going viral
Even for those who manage to keep up a regular fitness regime, forcing yourself to get up and go to the gym can be pretty difficult, especially in the dark and cold winter mornings. After a while, you can find plenty of reasons to leave.
Maybe you've realised that you don't go nearly enough to warrant the money you're spending each month, or maybe you've found a different gym to go to, but it's never that easy to quit without a sense of guilt. Even Friends explored the topic in one episode:
In a Reddit post by user "Mastrrbasser", one man detailed his difficulty getting away once he decided to end his contract with Planet Fitness. Like many others, this gym requires members to quit in person, making it that much harder to leave. But in this man's case, he now lived in a different state, so was required to send a letter.
"It is with deep regret, and a heavy heart that I write this letter," he wrote. "But I must come forth with my intentions with sincerity and honesty."
"Certain events in my life have put me in a different place, and while it was one of the more taxing decisions I've made as of late, it is the right one. The purpose of this letter is to end my relationship with Planet Fitness Orange."
Framing it as a breakup note, he adds all the melodramatic flourish needed to end such an important relationship. For those of you who have gone through the end of a relationship or two, you might've heard some of these familiar phrases.
"I know I've been distant, but it's because I've changed. I have different needs now, and to be frank... you really haven't changed at all. You're still that bulky, purple and yellow building with the tootsie rolls at the counter. I don't want to change you, and it pains me to think that we were once one, but are now separate and in different places
Furthermore, I've moved onto and into a new facility (the gym at my apartment complex), with a state of the art whachamacallit that really tones my thighs and masters my ass in ways that were hitherto unknown, and at proximity that would make you blush if you were to think about it.
I don't want you to be jealous, or to judge me based on this decision. That's not the Planet Fitness that I know and love. I still love you, but more like a friend at this point. I'm sorry things couldn't have been better between us."
The post has received hundreds of comments from other users who have gone through something similar when they wanted to end their memberships. It seems like plenty of gyms out there are hoping the inconvenience will lead a number of people to stick around for the next payment, due to being too busy or simple laziness.
"I still think fondly of you, and the time we spent together as I drive by one of your many locations. Sometimes, when I'm alone, I even throw on one of my old "power-pop workout" playlists and feel the rush of our past course through me as if we were still one; holding hands with your elliptical machine, and gingerly brushing my sweaty bangs out of my face as I huff and puff in a tumultuous vortex of sweat and endorphins"
"However, all good things must come to an end, and I hope this letter finds you well. You just keep being you, and while we will both grow, it will be into our own new lives without each other. I think this is for the better"
As a kicker to this tongue-in-cheek heartfelt letter, he added: "P.S. My wife also needs to cancel her membership". Maybe she didn't have quite such an emotional attachment with the gym.