5 Things that happen when you stop having sex regularly
Most people want to have sex as much as possible, and they're always trying to make it happen. In fact, I'm trying to have sex right now, as I write this article. So, if you live in Los Angeles, and you want to hook up, call me at - sorry. This isn't the right time. The point is, people like sex.
However, we all go through dry spells. You might be coming off a bad break-up, or you might be totally sick of the dating scene, or your life might be consumed with work. Having sex - or at least, having good sex, with the right person - can take effort. And sometimes, as those teenagers like to say, You "can't even." But should you "even"? How does a dry spell affect your body? Is it good for you, or bad for you?
Here are five things that happen when you stop having sex regularly.
1. You feel more anxious
When you have sex, your brain releases chemicals like endorphins and oxytocin, which are, to use a scientific term, "happy juice." You feel relaxed, at ease, and totally chill. It's the ultimate stress reliever. In fact, researchers in Scotland discovered that people who weren't going to Bone-Town "struggled to cope with stressful situations like public speaking." I mean, why do you think Scottish people wear kilts? Easy access, baby.
2. It's easier for you to get sick
A shag a day keeps the doctor away! No, seriously. It helps your immune system. According to researchers at the Wilkes-Barre University in Pennsylvania, when people have sex a couple times a week, they create a 30% boost of an antibody. And this isn't just any antibody. It's the antibody on the first line of defense against germs, kicking viruses' asses, like John Wick. Don't you want more of the John Wick of antibodies? I once saw him kill three men with a pencil.
3. You're less likely to get a UTI
Nobody wants UTI. And no, I'm talking not talking about Universal Technical Institute. I'm sure that's a fine school. I'm talking about Urinary Tract Infection. According to the journal American Family Physician, 80 percent of urinary tract infections happen within 24 hours of the ol' in-out-in-out, to use a scientific term. For women, the act of sex shoves bacteria up their vagina like shoving trash into an overstuffed garbage can. Sorry for comparing your ladyparts to a garbage can. I'm sure it's lovely. Anyway, if you stop having sex, you're less likely to get an UTI, so this is actually a bad thing, unless you like some pain when you pee. Personally, I love it!
4. It might ruin your relationship
Sex is an important part of a relationship. Sure, you can be intimate with your partner in other ways, like kissing, holding hands, giving sensual massages and "liking" everything they post on Facebook (so hot). But if you stop having intercourse regularly, things could get weird. "Going without sex in a relationship can impact your self-esteem and decrease levels of oxytocin or other bonding hormones," says psychologist Les Parrott, author of Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts. Also, a dry spell might lead to infidelity, as you and partner search for pleasure in other people. So, if you want to save your relationship, take some advice from Les Parrot and say "Les Getiton." (But maybe don't actually say that.)
5. You'll get sad
Okay, I know this one seems obvious: If you get laid, you're happy. Therefore, if you don't get laid, you're sad. Hand over the PhD, Mensa membership and MacArthur Genius Grant, please. But there's another scientific, kinda gross reason at play here. According to a study in the journal Archives of Sexual Behavior, the longer women go without having sex, the more depressed they get. Also, women whose partners wore condoms felt just as depressed as women whose partners wore no protection. It turns out semen contains chemicals that boost your mood, such as melatonin, serotonin, and oxytocin. Of course, having unprotected sex is risky, because you might get an STD or become pregnant. So, you'll have to make a "T" chart and weigh the advantages against the disadvantages, I guess. Either way, drink lots of pineapple juice.
So, if you stop having regular sex, you'll feel anxious, you'll get depressed, it could destroy your relationship and you might get the flu. But if you continue having regular sex, you might get a UTI. It's a tough call, but I'm sure you'll make the right choice.
In a related story, here are eight reasons you should have an orgasm every day...