A man had the perfect response after woman asked how she could deal with 'not being pretty'
Even as we grow up and become more comfortable with ourselves and the world around us, there are some things we just can't change. Each and every one of us has unique and incredible qualities worthy of love and acceptance, but sadly, not all of us can be deemed above average when it comes to looks.
But for those of us who can't afford plastic surgery, we've got to make the best with what we've got, but it's not always easy to deal with being a so-called unattractive person.
On the whole, attractive people earn higher salaries and are treated with more respect and dignity than their pizza-faced counterparts, but one woman wanted to know how to live as someone deemed less conventionally attractive.
This comes from the AskWomen subreddit, where a user which has since been deleted had a simple admission: "I am not pretty, and I never will be."
"I can wear make up, do my hair, wear a lovely dress and heels and I'll never look like a 9/10. I know it shouldn't bother me but it does- I want to be beautiful, and I get so jealous that these other girls are born pretty. How do you deal with not being attractive to most men? How do you accept how you look and learn to love yourself regardless?"
This anonymous user was having problems looking past her looks, with the insecurity seeping into every aspect of her daily life:
"I've always hated myself because of it and I feel like this is wrong because I'm a good person, so why should it matter? I blame everything on my looks- she doesn't like me because I'm ugly, I wasn't invited because I'm ugly, that person walking past me sniggered because I'm ugly etc."
It's a difficult question to answer, one which requires plenty of self-love and acceptance, but there was one Reddit user who completely summed the solution, and weirdly enough, it was a guy who came up with the amazing advice.
"I'm not 'mansplaining' or trying to discount how you feel," explains Reddit user SavageHenry0311 as he talked through while there might be hot bods and pretty faces, when it comes to the incredible phenomenon called love, none of that matters in the long run.
"I wish I could let you into a man's head as he's falling in love with a woman. It's a process that's so alien, so strange, that I'm afraid you've got to experience it to believe it... Sometimes, a guy will meet a gal and think nothing of it... Then, he gets to know her better. If they mesh personality-wise, something fascinating happens in the man's mind. He starts to notice things about her appearance - pleasant things."
Before long, little physical and emotional quirks become easier to notice and harder to ignore, and before long, "it's like she's gradually turned from a black-and-white photo into a 3D color movie with surround-sound". "To him, she is perfect and beautiful," SavageHenry0311 explains.
Y'see, ladies and gentlemen, this Reddit user suspects that the trick to all of this is that in a nutshell, love is blind. "There is a filter there, or some kind of participatory illusion. He does not see who you see in the mirror. He is seeing someone beautiful and perfect and sublime, and it's one of the most powerful things in his life."
"Go watch a happy old couple that's been married for decades. Watch the man's eyes. Sure, he may appreciate some young woman's ass in yoga pants or whatever...but watch his eyes when he's looking at his spouse. If you're paying close enough attention, you can almost see the filter click on when his gaze settles on her. In that moment, he's not seeing the same frumpy empty-nester that you or I see - he's seeing something wonderful."
Oh wow, isn't that sweet? Now, not all of us will be born with perfectly symmetrical faces or anything like that, but if we're lucky, we'll find someone who will fall in love for us for the things we are inside, and that kind love lasts for a lot longer.