Every year around Valentine's Day, a lot of people start putting some serious thought into their relationship status. Those who are currently with a partner do their best to show their love and appreciation for their significant other (or prepare to face some wrath once they realise they've forgotten to buy them a card), while the singletons either take it in their stride or turn the holiday into one of extreme self-pity.
Even for those who say they don't mind being on their own, though, Valentine's Day can't be the happiest day of the year - so it's understandable that some individuals might put out a sort of personals advert in order to find that special someone.
When one guy on Facebook tried to do this, though, it all ended up with him getting roasted.
In a now-deleted post, an anonymous man decided that he would write a list of demands for what he wanted from a girlfriend. Unfortunately for him, the open love letter had the opposite effect to what he'd intended, and instead he ended up getting wrecked by thousands of women online.
"I'm just a 35yo soul looking for love," the post began. Not a bad start, right? Well, get ready for this rollercoaster...
"If you're between 19-23, no taller than 5'1, 43-47kg, Caucasian or maybe halfcast something exotic, have a job, license, reasonably modest car, regularly gym (no skinny-fat girls thanks), have an "innie" vagina, C cup breasts, no cheap tattoos, no face piercings, have no ex-f**k buddies or ex-boyfriends who I know or know of and also willing to move to Canberra to be my girl, have a good personality and a sense of humour, never get bratty or start arguments over nothing, and not be insecure when I don't come home all weekend, then please... hit me up [sic]."
... Wow.
Honestly, there's so much to unpack here it's tempting to just throw away the whole suitcase. But, for entertainment's sake, let's have a good look through.
First of all, he's incredibly particular over what body type he wants from a woman (though his specification of an "innie" vagina suggests he might not have ever seen one naked before). Also, quite why a "reasonably modest car" would be preferable is anyone's guess, but compared to the rest of the demands it seems relatively vanilla.
Obviously, plenty of women were left in absolute dismay at his long list of bizarre requests, weren't at all keen on his attitude towards women, and were even less willing to "hit him up" and move to Canberra.
And, quite rightfully, a bunch of women decided to tell him as much.
"What a racist and misogynistic f**kwad," wrote one person.
"I was distracted by his casual racism and his blatant misogyny, and his bizarrely specific list of requirements. A 40kg weight range?! Weirdo," added another.
"This is unbelievably creepy. I feel like I need to take a shower after reading this," commented a third.
Needless to say, the guy didn't get any offers of romance or companionship. He did, however, get a few messages from people volunteering to smack him straight back to the misogynistic era he'd somehow crawled out from.
And if you're reading this as a single person on Valentine's Day, and you're feeling a little sorry for yourself, you can take comfort in one thing: at least you're not dating this guy.
