Sex therapists reveal what happens if you have sex every day
Depending on what stage of a relationship you're in with your partner, the frequency at which you get intimate might vary. For instance, if you're at the beginning of something new and exciting, you might find yourselves hopping into bed at pretty much any opportunity you can get. But, if you're in something longer term, you'll probably go at it less often and learn to appreciate all the other times you get with your significant other just as much as the sexy ones.
And, if you're married - well, I'm not going to stoop so low and suggest you don't have any sex life at all. But, y'know...
Anyway, regardless of how much nookie you are (or aren't) getting at the moment, it's safe to say that sexual desire is different for everyone.
But, according to Maslow's hierarchy of needs, sex is not just a want, but a need. Along with food, water, warmth, sleep, shelter, and - of course - air, sex is at the very base of our being and we depend on it in order to keep ourselves going.
So what happens if you have it every day?
Brittany Gibbons, an American author, explained how having sex every day for a year helped with her body confidence and vastly improved the communication between her and her partner. And, after hearing her story, many other people began to wonder whether getting it on every 24 hours could help them improve other aspects of their life, too.
However, according to some sex therapists, the issue isn't so cut and dry.
Dr Sheri Jacobson, the clinical director of Harley Therapy, spoke with Indy100 about how Gibbons' experience is probably very different to how most other people's would be.
"[Gibbons] was in a safe relationship, where she could say yes or no, state her needs, and be vulnerable. In this unique circumstance, then yes, perhaps sex could lead to body confidence," she said. "But we certainly could not take this story and then state ‘sex every day builds body confidence.’"
By contrast, it could really do some damage.
"Sex every day with, for example, various partners and strangers, especially if you have a traumatic past involving some sort of sexual abuse, could lead to shame, feelings of worthlessness, dissociation from the body, and depression," explained Dr. Jacobson.
She went on:
"It could mean we were pushing ourselves to have sex just to ‘keep the record going’, instead of listening to ourselves and recognising our needs in each moment, which is so essential if we at all suffer low self-esteem.
"So it could equally be a terribly dangerous game to play."
Essentially, like eating and sleeping, having sex is an action that needs to be based on intuition. We don't eat food or take a nap if we're not hungry or tired - so why do the dirty if our bodies aren't telling us to?
Ultimately, it's really down to how the individual feels about it.
"If you were with a loving partner or partners, and it was something you'd decided to do for fun, it might lead to better connection, and improved sexual confidence," the doctor said, "but you'd have to both be wanting sex at the same time and prioritise individual needs on a day-to-day basis over any 'ticking off a day on the calendar.'"
She went on to say that "Any big declaration you intend to have sex every day for a year with many different people is far less likely to be about body confidence and more likely to be a sign of deep-rooted issues, including trauma, sex addiction, or histrionic personality disorder."
As great as it may sound, having sex every day is likely to be damaging for people who don't particularly want it, and a sign of deeper issues for those who do. This is not to say that it can't be done. After all, Gibbons seemed to have a pretty good experience with it. But, like all good things, sex should be enjoyed in moderation.