It's hard when you're away from your best friend. When you're having a bad day, it helps to see their face. It would be great if they could hang out with you all the time, but no, they have to "work" and "sleep" and "have a baby." Why won't they quit doing all that stupid crap and hang out?!
Well, now there's a way to keep your friend's face around you all the time. The company Firebox has released Fresh Face: personalized air fresheners. You visit their website and upload a clear photo of a face - like you, your best friend, your mom - and then they print it out on both sides. You can also select from five scents - bacon, coffee, fresh linen, island breeze, and new car. I've never had a "bacon" air freshener before. That sounds a lot better than pine tree.
Now you can choose whose face you want to dangle from the dashboard during a long road trip. For example, you could pick your mom, and imagine her asking you why aren't married with kids, because all of your cousins are married with kids, and it's not like you're getting any younger, and it's not like she's going to be around forever. Okay, that's not the best example, because you might get so much anxiety you'd crash.
But hey, maybe you could turn your friend into an air freshener and you'll die laughing the next time you hang out. Or maybe you could turn that new person you're dating into an air freshener and really creep them out. The possibilities are endless.
If you don't drive a car, have no fear. The people at Firebox, who really should get therapy, created the Head Case: airport luggage with somebody's face on it. Again, the face can be anyone - you, your best friend, your mom. You'll never be confused which bag is yours at the airport again. But you may get a lot of strange looks, and you may be too embarrassed to pick the bag up when it comes around on the carousel. At the very least, no one's going to steal a bag with your face on it.
If you don't have a car or travel by airplane, and spend all your time in your apartment, playing with your cats, hoping that the phone will ring - good news! The people at Firebox, who really should just stop, but won't, created the Monster Mushion. It's a cushion with your face on it, and of course, the tagline is "Stuff your face."
We're getting to the point in our society where everything is personalized. And I, for one, couldn't be happier. I'm going to make an air freshener, luggage bag and cushion with the face of a girl I went on one date with, and surprise her with them on our second date. I'm sure she'll love it.
