You can hire this man to cry at your funeral
In the 21st century, there are countless ways to earn a living. You can sell ads on virtually any page online, and profit off of internet know-how alone. You can sell socks for cash, or knit anime pillows. You can make money off of pretty much anything. So people have gotten extremely creative with the ways they can make a buck online. This man may be the king of them all.
Sylvester Ricardo Moss went viral on Facebook, earning almost 20,000 shares advertising his services. What does he do? He cries at funerals. Literally, you can hire him to cry at any funeral, presumably even your own. Just wire the money before you're dead, and he'll show up, wailing like he was your best friend. Beautiful!
The post got even more popular on Twitter, earning 171,000 likes. Social media, indeed, has its moments.
His "summer special" prices are pretty hysterical.
- Normal Crying $50
- Bahamian hollering $100
- Crying and rolling on the ground $150
- Crying and threatening to jump into the grave $200
- Crying and actually jumping into the grave $1,000
Anyone got a thousand dollars? I want to hire this man to leap into the grave at my own funeral. It would be so incredible, and everyone would ask: "Who actually is he?" presuming that anyone showed up, that is.
You can make your loved ones feel even more loved by adding to the ranks of crying heartbroken funeral-goers. This man is truly a hero.
Twitter, of course, found it beyond hilarious.
As a side hustle, it really can't be knocked. Just show up, cry, and get paid. I would think it's a joke, but it's actually a hood business. Let's say someone's relative dies, someone who everybody hated. Just hire this guy and it'll look like they were loved! Have him jump headlong into the grave plot and embrace the corpse - a gorgeous moment is born. It may be the nicest thing anyone has ever done for the deceased.
Have you ever shown so much love to someone that you would drop a grand just to send someone into the grave after them, mourning them in the dirt itself? I don't think so. That's a special level of friendship.
Just wait - in like ten months there will be a massively viral video of Sylvester hopping , body-flopping, dropping into a grave screaming with tears, and it will all have begun here, with this genius idea.
Having some 'Bahamian hollering' at a funeral would really up the stakes, wouldn't it? It's poetic, like a viking funeral. You shout and roll and sob for the deceased...for profit. A plant. You can just tell the family it was an old college friend. Until he jumps INTO the casket as its being buried. Then it's just awesome.
In summation, you should hire this dude and there's not a whole lot else left to say.