10 Confessions from people who didn't know anything about sex when they lost their virginity
Losing your virginity can be the most memorable or most forgettable of experiences, but I don't think anyone really thinks of their first time as their favourite sexual escapades. It's probably because it's largely a kind of confusing, bumbling event that leaves your heart rate pumping alarmingly high and your cheeks a bit flushed.
Don't you wish someone gave you more detailed instructions on what to do? Like, way more "how to" than what your awkward sex ed teacher cared to divulge into? Well, these people certainly did. Luckily, they've passed on their tips about losing their virginity to Reddit, so at least there's hope for the other clueless people out there who haven't yet done the dirty.
1. No, no you don't
"You do not need to completely unravel a condom before you apply it to your penis."
2. Sort your playlist out beforehand mate
"Take your ipod off repeat one!!! Dust in the wind by kansas is a TERRIBLE song to lose your virginity to!!!"
3. It has a name?
"How messy it can be! The 'cuddle puddle' is real, my friends."
4. Don't worry, everyone gets nervous
"Vaginas can be really tight, and if you are a little floppy from nerves or whatever, it's not going to go in."
5. What... did you think women are cold-blooded?
"I guess not that I wish I knew but was so surprised by how warm it was, 100% caught me off guard not sure what I was thinking it'd be like."
6. Don't believe everything your older cousin Michael says
"I honestly wish I knew that it wasn't actually a requirement to slap her on the a**."
7. It's so much lower than you think
"Dude swear the first time I saw a vagina in real life my mind was blown. I had no idea it would be so far in between her legs. I guess I thought it was more like a penis and like more on the front."
8. This is pretty much universal though
"I wish I knew that sex, especially for your first time, isn't like the movies. There's going to be clumsy moments, mistakes, awkwardness, etc."
9. Well, everyone should know this already
"If you don't have a condom and she says 'it's okay I take the pill' do NOT proceed. Seriously. It's not only about getting her pregnant and producing a money destroying hell demon, but also STDs and stuff."
10. Everyone could do without the pressure
"Not really a moment for me personally, but I wish losing your virginity was less of a big deal. It doesn't really matter if it wasn't the best, if you were quite old or quite young, if you didn't have a relationship, if it wasn't really what you expected. It isn't really life changing and even though it was great, the "pressure" to lose your virginity shouldn't exist."
Do any of these stories stir up memories of your first time? Sorry if they did, I know you wanted to keep those embarrassing moments locked way, way away in the back of your memory. But what would life be if we could only remember the good stuff?