There is a woman called the 'Mad Pooper' pooping all over Colorado
Pooping: it's an action that we all do, but normally one that we prefer not to acknowledge. Regardless of how close we are to our friends and family, or how long we've lived with our significant others, there are certain types of bathroom visits that need to stay - quite literally - behind closed doors.
However, there are apparently some exceptions to the rule, as proved recently by a woman in Colorado Springs who won't stop leaving stinky surprises in public places.
One family in the area spoke to news sources about how they've been terrorised by the seemingly-incontinent jogger, whom they affectionately refer to as 'the Mad Pooper'. According to them, the woman leaves a rather unpleasant gift for them in their neighbourhood "about once a week".
Cathy Budde, who was alerted to the mad pooper after her kids witnessed the woman doing her business near their house, actually confronted the jogger about her actions.
“I was like ‘Are you serious? Are you really taking a poop right here in front of my kids?’ and she was like ‘yeah sorry,'” Budde said in an interview with a local news station. “I thought for sure she was mortified, it was an accident, she’ll go get dog bag, come back clean it up, you know and never run here ever again. Not the case.”
Since the initial conversation between Budde and the woman, the Mad Pooper has been spotted defecating on many occasions by several different residents in the area - and, unsurprisingly, none of them are all that happy about it.
"It's just not a natural thing to do in our society," said Mark Odette, a visitor to one of the parks targeted by the Mad Pooper, "to drop your trousers and relieve yourself right there - not when there's people around, especially."
The bizarre issue has become so serious that local police forces have become involved. Officers have asked Budde to snap some pictures of the jogger so that they can identify the culprit, and potentially charge her with indecent exposure and public defecation if she doesn't stop.
So far, though, the woman seems intent on continuing her pooping spree. This is despite the intervention of several different people, and a public notice put up by Budde. "I put a sign on the wall that's like, 'please, I'm begging you, please stop,'" she said.
The pooper's reasons for leaving butt chocolate about the place are as of yet unknown, and police are understandably baffled - especially as there's actually a public bathroom literally just a block away from where the, uh, evidence has been found.
“It’s abnormal, it’s not something I’ve seen in my career,” said Sgt. Johnathan Sharketti of the Colorado Springs Police Department. “For someone to repeatedly do such a thing … it’s uncharted territory for me.”
Lt Howard Black, another official from the department, added that, "I haven't come across anything like this in 35 years with the police department."
Here's the interview with Budde about the stinky offender.
Who knows if the Mad Pooper will return again, and - if she does - whether her identity will ever be uncovered. However, for the sake of the Budde family, the other residents of Colorado Springs, and the Mad Pooper herself, I hope we've seen the last of her.