Here are the 5 signs the person you're dating is 'breadcrumbing' you
Dating is a pain in the butt. There's always so much anxiety over whether you're being too involved (or not enough), whether you actually feel something for the person (or if you're just heavily invested in getting your rocks off), and - in more recent years - whether you're falling victim to some newfangled dating trend such as ghosting, phubbing, or breadcrumbing.
But what exactly is 'breadcrumbing'? Well, according to Jessica Bennett of the New York Times:
"Breadcrumbers check in consistently with a romantic prospect, but never set up a date. They pique your interest, of that prospective job, perhaps, by reminding you repeatedly that it exists, but never set up the interview.
"Breadcrumbers are one step shy of ghosters, who disappear without a trace, but are in more frequent contact than a person giving you the fade. On the hierarchy of digital communication, the breadcrumber is the lowest form."
Basically, they set up an enticing-looking trail for you to follow, but leave nothing at the end of it - and here's how you can spot it before it gets the better of you:
1. They communicate infrequently
Not everyone in the early dating phase enjoys texting constantly, but if your new love interest can only message you every few days with a vague "hey", the chances are that they aren't entirely invested in pursuing something serious.
2. You're always the one to make plans
Think back to your last few dates: who organised them? Who arranged the time and date? Who picked the restaurant/movie? Who suggested meeting up in the first place? If you're doing all the legwork, you may want to take a step back and analyse exactly how much your new beau is actually contributing to this whole dating situation.
3. Meanwhile, they only want to hook up
Ok, say they do make plans... but they're only ever to hook up. This isn't a sign of someone who wants a proper relationship; it's an indication that you are there to satisfy a need and not much more. And if you're cool with that, then there's no issue. However, if you're looking for something serious, you may need to reconsider the set-up you'be got going on.
4. They 'don't like labels'
There should never be any pressure to put a label on a relationship, especially if it's still in the very early stages. However, if you've been plodding along for the best part of a year and you're still not sure where you stand, you probably should have a little discussion about it.
5. You don't know how they feel
Have they ever expressed any emotion about your situationship? Do you know whether they 'like' like you, or even if they care? This shouldn't be such a difficult thing to work out, but, if you feel like it is, then there's a chance you're being breadcrumbed.
If any of these signs seem to fit your relationship, do yourself a favour and follow that trail of breadcrumbs right back to where you started: away from them.