Woman posts hilariously honest ad for a boyfriend on Facebook

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"Ok guys. This is probably the scariest post I’ve ever written but here goes. I, Rachel Salisbury, would like a boyfriend.

"I have been inspired to write this because someone I know wrote a post like this a few years ago and is now engaged (thank you Katie Brennan!). So I thought – right. Online dating is such a pain and I can’t quite force myself to use the apps. And in the olden days people did a bit of match-making for their friends (as my mum constantly reminds me). So here I go – I’m putting myself out there."

"I am an actor and a writer and I work on a box office and I run kid’s parties (phew!) I love theatre and films and music and books. I love singing and dancing (but not in a musical theatre way) and spending time with friends and my family and laughing and having interesting chats. I flatter myself I’m quite funny (RIGHT GUYS?).

"I try very hard to be a good person and am in general day to day in a pretty sunny mood. I’m a vegan and a socialist and a feminist and am very passionate about the above. I also lovesss to cook and bake and I love being in nature!"

"I am looking for… ideally… a) someone who’s got their sh*t together. Can’t be doing with flakiness or unreliability b) someone interested/involved in the arts in some way c) someone who’s generous and kind and warm and shiny and positive and happy to be silly and funny and have a great old time.

"If you have any friends and you think me and him would get on, drop me a message! I’ve attached some pics of my FACE.

"KTHANKSBYE *runs and hides in the corner of the room rocking* *awaits tumbleweed* *ripme*"