While the world of online dating has opened up new channels of communication that never used to be possible, it does have its downsides. For every story of someone meeting their life partner on Tinder or Bumble, there are 100 stories of unsolicited d**k pics, inappropriate language and just downright harassment.
Unfortunately, the majority of these messages come from men - who believe that they have a divine right to talk in a crude and disgusting manner to females in order to land themselves a date. However, while a large percentage of females simply ignore the messages, some do respond and it can be majestic.
Take a look at 13 of the best replies to creepy male text messages ever sent.
1. She answered the question to be fair
2. Lava or a creep? I know which I'd take
3. Well, you didn't specify
4. Very punny
5. Urm, I don't really get where this is going
6. The female BOSS
7. I wonder which part of "no" he doesn't understand - the "n" or the "o"?
8. Tinder or an English lesson? You decide
9. The perfect answer
10. She's got you sussed, Alex
11. You two would make a great couple
12. Wheeeeeey!
13. She has absolutely done you there
So there you have it, the best way to deal with creepy Tinder trolls is to clap back at them. Not only will it more than likely shut them up, but you may even achieve a certain level of internet notoriety.
When it comes to dating, some guys have trouble taking no for an answer. I admit, in the past, I've gotten women's numbers and kept texting them, over and over again, despite getting no response. (Twenty texts in a row is too much, right?) Oh well. Rejection is like the sun; hard to face, and the longer you feel it, the more it hurts.
But dating isn't super fun from the woman's point of view either, is it? Every time girls go out, they get bombarded by dudes trying to get their number. And let's face it, some of them are pretty creepy. (I can't relate.) Sure, it's easy to block people these days, but where's the fun in that? A better solution might be to troll.
On Imgur, Ashontez shared photos from three hilarious pranks he played on creepy dudes, who kept bugging his female friend.
"I'm a dude, and one of my best friends keeps getting hit on by creepy dudes at the bar. She gave one dude her number to get him to go away and then just blocked it when he texted her. Well, dude didn't like that and started harassing her friends. (cops got involved, it wasn't pretty)
"Since then I've told her to give out my number to guys she doesn't want to talk to, if they press the issue after she says "no." I gotta say, its so much fun seeing how pissed off they get when they realize they've been duped and have been "sexting" a dude the entire time. I'll post screenshots of some of the messages later, you can't make some of this shit up."
In less than a day, Ashontez's posts have received over 200,000 views. Enjoy! (And beware.)
Victim #1: Bathroom Brad
He waited thirty minutes for her.
Victim #2 - D*ckpic Derick
He's a bit of a hypocrite.
Victim #3 - Cannibal Chris
He's a picky eater.
Thanks to Ashtontez for sharing his brilliant work. As long creepy dudes keep harassing women, women (and their friends) will hilariously troll them.
Sigh.
Do we have to keep going over this? Is it really so amusing to send vulgar messages to women on Tinder that we have to keep talking about them? Why can't we share the lovely messages and high quality banter that other Tinderonis enjoy between them? All we hear about are the gross ones, and I don't think that's really very healthy for us.
I mean, I 100% blame the internet and the subsequent invention of dating apps on my total desensitisation to gross messages directed at women. I can scroll through these kind of lists now without dry-retching or even feeling tempted to throw my phone across the room. That's bad, isn't it?
But that's the way it is for many, many unsuspecting females who are (usually) just trying to use Tinder to genuinely meet a decent guy. At least these girls have done the right thing by taking screenshots of their conversations (if you can call them that) and sharing them with the internet.
Here are some of the strongest contenders for the title of Filthiest Tinder Messages of late:
1. Oh lordy...
2. This guy with zero clues
3. Gee thanks
4. This one's got us all figured out
5. Aaaaand there goes another one that could've been normal
6. We've got a man on a mission over here
7. Props for creativity, but still... no
8. YUCK.
9. It was intriguing until the end
10. Thanks but no thanks
11. Wow things turned quickly there
12.Modern day poets over here
13. Wow what a tempting offer
14. What does this even mean?
15. You wanna do what now?
16. *Crickets chirping*
17. The face says it all
18. Nothing more charming than religious sex puns
19. She can play that game too
Someone needs to look into whether Prince Charming or similar has any living descendants, because SOMEONE needs to teach some of these guys a thing or two about how to talk to ladies in a nice and non disgusting way. Now please just leave me to slowly shake my head over the state of things until the end of time.
Gone are the days of sending love letters to your crush and presenting flowers/chocolates/sparkly bits of jewellery to them as a token of your affection. Now, it's all dating apps, swiping right, and judging the quality of banter in your conversations before deciding whether you'd actually like to meet in person.
And while there are plenty of success stories about people who met on Tinder and the like, there are just as many tales exchanged between friends regarding the different creeps that message people with questionable opening questions, requests for "n00dz", and VERY in-your-face pictures of their own private parts, that were neither requested nor welcomed.
Some women have decided to share their responses to such unsolicited messages online, and their comebacks are hilarious. Take a look at these 17 examples – we've got a lot to learn from these women!
Women have been dealing with creepy guys since the dawn of time. It's a fact of life, much like 'the sky is blue', or 'catcalling is disgusting'.
Before the internet, however, the worst of these encounters were mostly limited to bars and clubs - usually when the creepsters were in drink-throwing/slapping distance. However, with the existence of text messaging and social media, men have been finding more and more ways of hitting on women who really aren't interested.
Of course, a simple 'no' sometimes sorts the matter - but often it just isn't enough. We have been forced to find more creative methods in order to shut men down, and here are some of the best:
1. In the war
Why is it always feet with these people?
2. Be original, guy
Funny how they always go from 'Hey :)' to 'bitch' after being told 'no'.
3. You asked for it
'Oo no' indeed.
4. Own it
Sometimes you just have to be blunt with these people.
5. Shut down
As a general rule: if a woman says she's gay, she probably isn't interested.
6. In class
Sometimes it's just funnier to play dumb.
7. Nice Try
He even waited a minute to send the second message. I can't.
8. Next level creepy
Could this guy sound any more like a murderer if he tried?
9. Child support
Ask a stupid question, expect a stupid answer.
10. Simply riddled
If anyone was looking for an easy shut-down, this person seems to have found one.
11. Lol only joking
Sometimes no response is the best response.
12. Nude veggies
Seriously, he was that desperate?
So, modern technology may have given men the ability to creep on women - but it also gave women the means to screenshot those messages and post them on the internet for all to see. It's hardly a compromise, but at least it makes the ordeal a little more entertaining.
The online dating world and communicating via messages can be a challenge for the best of us. Sometimes you'll send extremely embarro messages to the wrong number, other times you might use emojis that end up accidentally offending someone. But a lot of the time, weirdo chat up lines, unasked for pictures of private parts and outright perverse messages are not welcome, land in your message box anyway.
Come on guys, it's not that hard. Can you just not be creepy and gross and send nice, interesting questions to start a decent conversation, that doesn't end up with you feeling utterly disgusted with the human population? I mean, there are actual tips from experts about how to successfully navigate the online dating world.
Anyway, there are ways you can fend off and deflect such messages from creeps, and we've collected the best of the bunch for you to take inspiration from.
1. Two can play that game
2. Generic AND grammatically incorrect... that calls for something drastic
3. Not interested buddy
4. Enough of this small talk
5. Lol... this "cat"
6. Let's talk practicalities
7. A picture speaks a thousand words
8. Well played
9. Not really feeling it tbh
10. Be more specific about next time
11. Scare them with randomness
12. That'll freak him out...
13. Cera-ously?
These are just too good. Keep them saved in your repertoire just in case you're subject to messages of a similar nature in the future.
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