All Carrie Underwood fans know that the end of 2017 was a hard time for her, after the star revealed she had sustained some nasty injuries after suffering a frightening fall in November.
However, the singer has recently revealed that 2017 and the beginning of 2018 was much tougher than any fan could have imagined, admitting that she suffered through three devastating miscarriages.
The 35-year-old is a mother to three-year-old Isaiah and is currently pregnant with her second child with husband Mike Fisher, but revealed it's been a struggle to get to this point, in an emotional interview on CBS Sunday Morning.
She started off by discussing her much-publicized accident, claiming the accident changed the way that she saw herself. She said: "It was also a perception thing, because I look at myself [now] and I see it quite a bit, but other people are like, 'I wouldn’t have even noticed.' Nobody else looks at you as much as you think they do. Nobody notices as much as you think they will, so that’s been nice to learn."
Going on to speak about the first miscarriage, she stated 2017 wasn't what she expected, saying: "I’d kind of planned that 2017 was, you know, going to be the year that I work on new music, and I have a baby. We got pregnant in early 2017, and didn’t work out. And that was the thing, in the beginning, it was like, ‘Okay, God, we know this is, just wasn’t your timing. And that is all right. We will bounce back and figure our way through it."
However, the Cry Pretty songstress' faith was seemingly tested when she went through another miscarriage in 2017 and then a third in 2018."At that point, it was just kind of like, ‘Okay, like, what’s the deal? What is all of this?'" she said.
The singer continued by claiming that she tried to not allow herself to feel anger at the situation, stating: "I had always been afraid to be angry because we are so blessed. And my son, Isaiah, is the sweetest thing. And he’s the best thing in the world. And I’m like, 'If we can never have any other kids, that’s okay, because he’s amazing. And I have this amazing life. Like, really, what can I complain about? I can’t. I have an incredible husband, incredible friends, an incredible job, an incredible kid. Can I be mad? No.'"
However, when she thought she might have been suffering a fourth miscarriage, she finally became angry. "I got mad," Underwood told CBS News’ Tracy Smith, confessing that one of her most emotional moments came as she shared a cuddle with her son.
Carrie claims she thought: "'Why on Earth do I keep getting pregnant if I can’t have a kid? Like, what is this? Shut the door. Like, do something. Either shut the door or let me have a kid.'"
She added: "And for the first time, I feel like I actually I told God how I felt. That was like a Saturday — and the Monday I went to the doctor to, like, confirm another miscarriage. And they told me everything was great! He heard me."
Speaking about the future, the star admitted she worried her and Mike had missed their chance to have a big family but claimed they were open to adoption.
"We always talk about adoption and about doing it when our child or children are a little older," she said. "In the meantime, we’re lucky to be a part of organizations that help kids, because our focus right now in our lives is helping as many kids as possible."
Thanks for bravely sharing your story Carrie.
