Isn't it exciting when a celebrity gets a new love interest? It is, isn't it? Isn't it just thrilling when someone you don't know and who doesn't care about your existence, gets romantically linked with someone? Man, I just can't think of anything that peaks my interest more.
Well luckily for me - and you, I imagine - we have another celebrity love story. Jennifer Lawrence, yes, Jennifer Lawrence, the 27-year-old actress known for her roles in the Hunger Games among many other movies, has landed herself a new man. That's right, folks, J Law is a taken lady!
So, who is the lucky chap? Well, surprisingly, he's not anybody famous. I know, right? Weird. The world of celebrity dating is usually a pretty incestuous place, with the majority of famous people only dating other famous people. But, J Law, much like Adele, has shown that status doesn't mean everything and has hooked herself up with a regular dude... kind of.
You see, not only is Jen's new man a successful art dealer in New York - meaning he is probably pretty loaded - but he also has a completely ridiculous name that makes me think that he doesn't exist: Cooke Maroney.
Maroney (if he is real) currently works as a director at New York's Gladstone Gallery. The prestigious gallery reps artists including Lena Dunham‘s dad, Carroll Dunham, as well as Richard Prince, Anish Kapoor, Ugo Rondinone and Bjork’s ex, Matthew Barney.
The lovebirds were introduced to each other by someone with a much more ordinary name: Laura Simpson. A source told Page Six that “they met through Jen’s friend Laura … The relationship has been going on a few weeks. But they have been very private and careful not to be seen together.”
Lawrence has been linked with several men across the last year or so and recently split from director Darren Aronofsky in November due to the fact that they were "at different places in their lives." Despite the split, the duo have remained close friends and she even presented him with an award at BAM last week. Before Darren, Jen was linked to Chris Martin and fellow actor Nicholas Hoult.
According to reports, Maroney is 33 and can be regularly be found at high-end art openings around town. He's not the first art dealer to be linked to an A-lister in recent times, with it being rumoured that Amber Heard is currently dating Vito Schnabel, an art dealer who was previously linked to Heidi Klum.
One man who will be devastated by the news is John Mayer. The guitarist appeared on Andy Cohen this week and said: “Jennifer Lawrence … just doesn’t want anything to do with me.”
Sorry, but with a name like Cooke Maroney, I'm not buying that this guy is real. In my mind, it's more than likely that Lawrence has made him up in order to stop creepy guys - and John Mayer - from actively pursuing her. Better luck next time, gents.
