Man sets girlfriend strict list of rules for watching 'Avengers: Endgame'
Put on your powered exoskeleton, grab your vibranium steel shield, and lose an eye fighting the Asguardian goddess of death, because today's the big day: The premiere of 'Avengers: Endgame,' the culmination of a story told across 22 Marvel superhero movies.
(Well, technically, the 23rd film, Spiderman: 'Far From Home' will conclude 'Phase Three.' Then 'Phase Four' will pick up afterward, with 'Black Panther 2,' 'Doctor Strange 2,' 'Guardians of the Galaxy 3,' 'Untitled Black Widow Movie,' 'Shang-Chi' and 'The Eternals.' But still - it's the end of something!)
Watch the trailer for Avengers: Endgame
In last year's Avengers - Infinity War, the thicc purple supervillain Thanos acquired all six Infinity Stones, and the amulets aren' just sick Ric Flair Drip. They grant him incredible power. Seeking to solve the universe's overpopulation problem, he snaps his fingers, and half of all life dies. Just like that, many of our favorite Avengers, like Black Panther, Spider-Man and Drax - crumbled away into ashes. (Although Drax may be just be invisible. He's very good at standing still.)
The spoiler-free reviews are already in, with critics calling the film 'perfect.' "#AvengersEndgame is a masterful epic - a true culmination of 22 films that not only concludes the story, but expands upon it," wrote Erik Davis from Fandango. "You’ll learn more about the other movies while this one unfolds. If Infinity War is the brawn, Endgame is the brains. And wow, what an ending!"
For many Marvel fans, this three-hour film is a big deal, and they don't want their theater experience ruined. Hoping to avoid distractions, one fan, Cyrille Sokpor, set a strict list of rules for his girlfriend, Kamilla Rose. Kamila shared the list on Twitter, writing, "My boyfriend sent me a very sternly worded note about our cinema trip to see #AvengersEndgame tomorrow. Mad because I thought it was just date night."
The letter reads:
"We will not be queuing to buy popcorn, please make prior arrangements.
"You are not permitted to consume any food during the film including end credits - you may quietly drink water.
"I will not be moving to allow you to pass for a toilet break - find an alternative route.
"You will not communicate with me during the trailers or the duration of the film (inc end credits).
"In case of an emergency involving our son, I give you full authority to leave and take control - I will join you after the film (including end credits).
"'After the film (including end credits) we will have a 30 minute debrief session to discuss the events, followed by a period of quiet personal reflection.
"It is acknowledged that I may not be my usual self post this film. Please do not be alarmed.
"Thank you for your cooperation. I look forward to a pleasurable viewing experience.
"Kind regards. Cyrille."
In the replies, Marvel fans agreed with the rules, finding them perfectly reasonable. "Good!," tweeted @chick_canon. "There needs to be a friends version of this as well. Or a relatives version for those that want to 'hang out and see a movie as family'. 🙄"
Well, I'm thinking about going to see the film with a megaphone, and cracking jokes constantly like Mystery Science Theater 3000. Good idea, or nah?