It's June 15, and you know what means: It's World Elder Abuse Awareness Day! Woooo! And also, it's North West's birthday. North, of course, is Kim Kardashian and Kanye West's oldest child. Today she turns five years old, which means she's officially more mature than Kanye. (And probably understands politics better.)
Time flies, huh? It just seems like just yesterday Kimye announced her name was "North West" and everyone was making jokes on Twitter. But unique names are cool. For example, my name is Joe, and that's so boring. I'd prefer the French spelling, Jeaux. Anyway, Kim and Kanye have a knack for naming. They named their second child Saint and their third Chicago. Since Kanye loves Donald Trump now, I bet they'll call their fourth child MAGA.
In celebration of the big five, momager Kris Jenner shared a cute photo of North on Instagram. In the caption she wrote, "it brings me so much joy to watch you grow into such a beautiful, fun-loving, spirited, kind, smart and funny little lady!"
However, Kim's post was even more adorable. She shared a photo of North from her unicorn-themed birthday party, which she shared with her cousin, Penelope Disick. Damnit! I was going to throw a unicorn-themed birthday party! And now if I do it, I'm just going to look like a copycat. Thanks a lot, North. Now I have to change the theme to my second choice, Hello Kitty. I am so bummed out.
Anyway, Kim also posted a heartfelt message: "My baby girl turns 5 today. Never did I think back then that I would have my best friend for life! I'm so honored to be your mom Northie! You have brought more joy into my word than I ever could have imagined. I can't believe your [sic] so big now! The luckiest girl in the world to be best friends with your cousins and have the most magical parties together! I love you so much birthday girl!"
But that's not all. Kim also posted a funny birthday message on Twitter. If you're like me, you spend your free time watching Kim Kardashian interviews on talk shows and committing all of her quotes to memory. Well, we all remember what Kim said about North on Live With Kelly And Ryan on August 28, 2017. "She does not like her brother. It's so hard for me."
Hey, sometimes older siblings and younger siblings don't get along. It's a rivalry. And if my little sister is reading this: Ha-ha, Beth! I always beat you at Monopoly!
Anyway, for Kim's second birthday message to North, she wrote, "Now that you’re 5, don’t you think it’s the mature thing to try to be nice to your brother!?!" Hilarious. More moms should shade their daughters on their birthday. I wonder what Kanye's birthday message to North was. Probably, "Taylor Swift's a snake. Here's a seven-song album of lullabies in Autotune."
