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Man 'locked in his body' for more than a decade heard his mom utter four words before waking up
A man who spent more than a decade "locked in his body" has revealed the heart-wrenching four words his mom said before he woke up.
Martin Pistorius, originally from Johannesburg, South Africa, was just 12 when he became seriously ill after experiencing symptoms that were dismissed as the flu.
Doctors suspected cryptococcal meningitis and tuberculosis of the brain, but despite treatment, Martin's condition continued to deteriorate, and he eventually lost his ability to speak, make eye contact, or control his movements and went into a vegetative state.
His parents, Rodney and Joan Pistorius, were told that their son would likely never wake up. But they refused to give up hope and continued caring for him while he lived in a special care center.
What they didn't know was that Pistorius began regaining consciousness.
In an interview on The Wright Stuff, he compared the experience of slowly becoming aware again to "when you are trying to wake up from a dream, but can't."
And in another 2023 interview, he recalled: "I remember around my 16th birthday, people talking about the stubble on my chin and wondering whether to shave me."
Between the ages of 16 and 19, Pistorius said his consciousness returned completely.
However, with his body still largely paralyzed, apart from being able to move his eyes, he had no way of telling anyone that he could see, hear, and understand what was happening around him.
"I was able to hear, see, and understand everything around me, but I had absolutely no power or control over anything," he said.
"For me, that feeling of complete and utter powerlessness is probably the worst feeling I have ever experienced, and I hope I never have to experience it again. It is like you don't exist; every single thing in your life is decided by someone else.
"Everything, from what you wear, to what you eat and drink, even if you eat or drink, to where you will be tomorrow, or next week, and there is nothing you can do about it."
As the years passed, he could listen to conversations around him and became aware of major world events, including the death of Princess Diana and 9/11.
Martin desperately tried to show his dad he was awake
Pistorius spent many hours sitting motionless at the care center, where he was forced to watch children's programs, including Barney the Dinosaur and Teletubbies.
"I cannot even express to you how much I hated Barney," he once told NPR.
Unable to communicate, he learned to use the shadows moving around the room to track the hours.
Meanwhile, he desperately tried to find some way of showing those around him that his mind was still working.
In a piece for the Daily Mail, Pistorius recalled trying to alert his father while Rodney was helping him get ready for bed.
"I would try to get him to understand I had returned, willing my arm to work. 'Dad! I'm here! Can't you see?', but he didn't notice me.
"He continued to undress me, and my gaze slid to my arm. It was not moving: its only outward manifestation was a muscular twitch close to my elbow. The movement was so tiny, I knew my father would never notice it. Rage filled me. I felt sure I'd burst. I gasped for breath. 'Are you OK, boy?' Dad asked as he heard my ragged breathing and looked up.
"I could only stare, praying my silent desperation would somehow communicate itself. 'Let's get you into bed, shall we?'" he added.
The heartbreaking words his mom didn't know he could hear
One of the most painful moments came when Pistorius heard his mom say four heartbreaking words, not realizing her son could understand her.
In a joint interview with NPR, Joan recalled saying: "I hope you die."
She explained: "'I hope you die.' I know that's a horrible thing to say. I just wanted some sort of relief."
Although the words were hard for Pistorius to hear, he later understood his mother’s desperation.
"The rest of the world felt so far away when she said those words. [..] As time passed, I gradually learned to understand my mother's desperation. Every time she looked at me, she could see only a cruel parody of the once-healthy child she had loved so much," he said.
He has also opened up about being mistreated by some carers who believed he was unable to understand what was happening.
"I am not angry about the abuse," he said, per Metro. "But it changes something inside you. It feeds feelings of worthlessness, being unlovable, self-doubt. It can break something deep within."
The breakthrough that changed Martin's life
Eventually, relief carer and therapist Virna van der Walt began noticing tiny movements that suggested Pistorius was more aware than others realized.
She encouraged his parents to have his cognitive abilities assessed, and in July 2001, nearly 13 years after he first became ill, specialists discovered he was cognitively aware.
During testing, a researcher showed Pistorius a sheet containing symbols and asked him to identify different objects. He was able to respond using his eyes.
"Everyone was so used to me not being there that they didn’t notice when I began to be present again," he said.
His parents later bought him a computer equipped with communication software, allowing him to select letters, words, and symbols using a band attached to his head that functioned like a mouse.
After regaining the ability to communicate, Pistorius began working with van der Walt at the care centre. He later met Joanna, a social worker, and the pair married in Essex in 2009.
The couple welcomed their son, Sebastian Albert Pistorius, in 2018 after previously being told that becoming parents might not be possible.
He went on to study computer science and now works as a computer scientist, web developer, technology adviser, and accessibility specialist.
Pistorius has since shared his extraordinary life in his 2012 autobiography, Ghost Boy.