The Whole Foods Instagram account only follows two people, but nobody can figure out why
You don't have to be a Millennial or Gen Z-er to know how good a follow-back on social media feels. For whatever reason, little spikes of dopamine hit your brainwaves as if you've bitten into a powdered jam donut anytime that follower counter goes up, and there seems to be nothing you can do about it.
That feeling is sent into absolute overdrive if a celebrity ever comes across your page. They don't even have to be a real celebrity, nowadays we'll even settle with the satisfaction of something we've come across every day, like our favourite razor, our football team or even the place we go to at lunch, gracing our profile pages.
Whole Foods, however, don't want to give us this satisfaction. The supermarket and Jeff Bezos clique member has long been the place where you occasionally buy salad bar food that always ends up being just okay - despite the endless hype Megan from Commercial gives it - but you love the place anyway for reasons you can't really understand. Today we learn that the conscious supermarket only follows two people on social media and the world is really confused as to why.
Even with all the money I throw at Whole Foods, they won't follow me. At this point, I should be part owner, riding jet skis with Bezos somewhere in the Caribbean, if the money I spent there was put into some share scheme. Whole Foods, with over 2.6 million followers, only follow two people: Beyonce and Sting.
These two extremely different musicians are the only Instagram accounts it's following. It's also wiped all previous posts from its account, replacing them with two blank, white posts, and it's added a bumble bee emoji to its bio. Very minimalist!
The only conclusion I can draw is Bee Sting: Beyoncé to Bey - Bey Sting - Bee Bting. We presume some form of branded wonder awaits us - and probably soon. At this point, though, what that might be is anyone's guess. Will we get a Beyoncé and Sting duet? Do we want one of those? Do we want it, and just not know we do? Is this at all honey-related?
Whole Foods wants to shine a light on what would happen to the world if the bee population goes extinct. One @mariparroh points out bees are in danger of extinction, so much so that the United Nations created National Bee Day last year to raise awareness around the cause.
There's a lot to learn about the issue, but in short, bees are a vital part of crop production for tons of the ingredients we eat regularly, including almonds, blueberries, and watermelon, and their habitats are being destroyed by humans. Another Instagram user speculated that most (if not all) of the groceries that Whole Foods sells would be possible without bees.
It's that or Beyoncé and Sting hacked Whole Foods together for OTR II.V. That's more unlikely than Kim Kardashian following me back with my 100 followers.