When I was growing up in Minnesota, I remember hoping for 'snow days' every winter. And since winter in Minnesota is a freezing arctic nightmare, I often got my wish. Some days school began two hours later, because we had to wait for snow plows to clear the roads. Some days we got out of school at lunch, because of an impending blizzard. And somedays, we didn't have school at all - a free day to go sledding, make snowmen and have snowball fights. (Or if the weather's too bad, watch Nickelodeon, read Goosebumps and play Nintendo 64.
However, the fun is over for kids in one South Carolina school district. There will no more snow days spent relaxing home, no more huddling by the radio hoping for a cancellation announcement - no more happiness or hope forever! Fox 6 reports that Anderson School District 5 has replaced snow days with online classes. Earlier, you might have felt a great disturbance, as if hundreds of voices cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced - that was the kids in Anderson School District 5 hearing this news.
On Facebook, the school district announced they were selected to be part of the eLearning pilot program. Students in grades 3 through 12 will use Chromebook devices to access assignments at home via Google Classroom. And no, you can't use "I don't have the Internet" as an excuse. Nice try! The school district says internet connectivity is not required. Students can download the assignments in advance at school. And the parents can monitor them at home - you guys aren't busy, right?
According to the school district, the terrible, horrible, no good, very bad technology will be implemented during the 2018-2019 school year. They have created a calendar without any inclement weather makeup days. To use contemporary teen slang, I'm sure the kids do not find this news "lit," "Gucci" or "straight fire." Rather, they and their "squad" are probably "salty" and "throwing shade," "tbh," "hundo P."
"At the end of the day, it makes common sense and financial sense to implement this program," said Superintendent and Super-buzzkill Tom Wilson in a news release. "No longer will we need to run buses mid-June for a makeup day that only a quarter of our students attend."
Students in kindergarten through 12th grade are required to register online before the first day of school on August 20th. Today is August 1st, which means, according to my excellent math skills honed in the American public school system, you have 18 more days of summer! I mean, 19 more days of summer. Make 'em count!
I guess this isn't such a big deal, though. How many 'snow days' do they really use in South Carolina? Also, when snow days are taken, make-up days are tacked on at the end of the year. It's better to have more days off in the summer than the winter, right? Instead of fond memories of going sledding and having snowball fights, they'll have fond memories of taking online classes, while being closely monitored by their irritated parents.