Sometimes when couples flirt in public, it's totally cute. And sometimes, they're so annoying, you just want to zap them both with a taser. Now, you might be thinking, "Aren't you just saying that because you're sad and alone?" No. I am not alone. I have seven cats. If anything, I'm too popular.
Comedian Pete Davidson and pop singer Ariana Grande are the hottest Hollywood couple since Charlie Sheen and cocaine. While photos of the two together are rare, they constantly comment on each other's Instagram posts. Pete commented, "Love this caption. Caption Queen." Ariana replied, "King of loving my captions." Under a photo of them both in Harry Potter robes, Pete commented, "the chamber of secrets is opened." Ariana replied, "u tryna slytherin (i'm deleting my account now)." It's only a matter of time before they get it on live on Instagram TV.
After less than a month of dating, Pete and Ariana are officially engaged. That's right, the young generation moves fast. Clearly, these two are still in the "lovey dovey" phase of their relationship. Once they get married, they'll enter the next phase, "years of lingering resentment and fights over the definition of 'clean.'" It's an exciting journey. But at the moment, it's a springtime love, when songbirds chirp and they're still not comfortable farting in front of each other.
On Instagram, Pete shared a sensual photo of Ariana wearing a white bikini. In the caption, he wrote, "what the actual f--k," followed by the heart-eyes emoji. And he's right to swoon, because holy crap, she looks stunning. In the comments, Ariana wrote, "I love you so much." Pete replied, "love u more tho."
But all the exhausting public displays of affection must have been too much for Seth Rogen. Exhausted by all this gooey gushy flirting, he commented, "Guys seriously." Hilarious - and this remark probably reflects what's on a lot of people's minds.
Pete Davidson jokingly fired back at Seth, "when ur getting married to the hottest you tell me how you'd act." Well, the man's got a point.
Last night Pete Davidson appeared on The Tonight Show With Jimmy Fallon, and confirmed his engagement. During the interview, he admitted he was pretty lucky to be Ariana's fiancé.
"I feel like I won a contest. It’s so sick. It’s f–king lit, Jimmy. It’s so lit. It’s so funny when you’re walking down the street, dudes are walking by and... [tips hat]. Some guy came up to me and said, ‘yo man, you like gave me hope.’ I didn’t know I was that ugly."
Well, if we were in Pete's shoes, we'd probably act the same way. But we're not, so hopefully Seth Rogen will post more irritated comments. Their world may be "f--king lit," but our world is "f---king dark" and all that light is hurting our eyes.