Crystal Hefner, Hugh Hefner's widow, has recently opened up about what intimacy was like with the Playboy CEO.
The 37-year-old recently opened up about her life as a Playboy model and wife to the man who started the country's sexual revolution in her memoir, Only Say Good Things: Surviving Playboy and Finding Myself.
She revealed that while things in the mansion may have seemed hot and steamy, sex with her husband of nine years was not.
Instead, there was no kissing, romance, or intimacy in their bedroom.
"This was a well-oiled and well-practiced sequence of events. One that went the same exact way every time," Crystal wrote. "Picking some girls from the party and bringing them up. Changing into the uniform for the job: silk pajamas. The dimming of the lights. The music. The porn. Passing the pot. And then the sex."
Even after she married the man who was 60 years her senior, she was stuck in this never-ending cycle of "odd and robotic" sex.
"[It was] like Hef was just going through the motions of something that had once been fun and sexy," she continued. "Or maybe it was never fun and sexy."
Despite the editor-in-chief of the once-popular magazine being the one to give a poor performance in bed, Crystal blamed those around him for plying him with such confidence.
"I think when you have so much money and power and so many 'yes people' around you, you just stick with your own narrative in your mind," Crystal stated. "And then everyone else just goes along with it."
She alleged that Hugh never once looked at her when it was her turn to take the reins. Instead, he just stared blankly upward at a mirror placed above the bed.
"There was nothing sexy about it," she recalled in the book. "It was about power and control and leverage. It was a performance. I was auditioning for a part."
In such repetitive moments, she often found herself wondering if anyone else before her enjoyed the process with Hugh.
"He seemed less sex-savvy than some of the teenage boys I’d been with years ago," she wrote. "It was clear to me Hef had never taken a moment in his entire life to figure out how to please someone else."
Crystal then revealed that the intimacy stopped altogether in 2014, three years before Hef's death, and so did the group sex and the extra performances - much to her relief.
"For years, I had been keeping up the Playboy Playmate charade for Hef, for the public," she said before adding: "Now I wondered if that place had ever really existed."
In a separate interview with the outlet, Crystal also detailed the "hold" Hugh had on all the girls at the mansion.
"At the time I thought I was on top," she told People, of the period of time after she first accepted Hef's invitation to the mansion in October 2008. "I thought, wow, if I just like everything that he likes and do all the things that he wants me to do, then I'm the favorite. And I was, but I just lost myself in the process."
However, once she got there, she realized it wasn't all glitter and sunshine like it was portrayed to be.
The girls were all allegedly controlled, even down to the color they got on their nails and they all received an allowance to help them to continue to beatify themselves to fit the traditional Playboy image.
"Our nail polish couldn’t be anything but some neutral color, no French manicure," Crystal told the outlet.
She couldn't have a belly button ring because that was "trashy."
"He would tell me 'wear the flag,'" she continued of the rules. "That’s the Playboy logo and those shirts were uncomfortable and cheap."
She was also forced to dye her hair whenever her naturally darker roots would start to show.
"So I’d have to go bleach it and it would burn my scalp and I’d have blisters," she added. "But for some reason I thought this was all normal and that’s what it meant to be seen as beautiful in Hef’s eyes."
Only Say Good Things: Surviving Playboy and Finding Myself is now available to purchase from major book retailers.
