First dates are always a little intimidating. Aside from the stress about what to wear, the anxiety over whether or not they'll like you, and the sheer panic of saying something totally inappropriate, there's one fear that surpasses them all: what if the person you're meeting up with is an utter a-hole?
Unfortunately, it does happen sometimes - and Kimberley Latham-Hawkesford knows this all too well.
A short while ago, she went on a date with a guy who she (presumably) thought was a bit of a catch. One date. Then she heard nothing from him. But hey, that's pretty standard these days: you meet up, you don't get along, you ghost one another and pretend it never happened.
However, this guy didn't remain a phantom for very long. Instead, he crept back into Kimberley's DMs *three months* after their initial meet-up... only to insult her in every conceivable way.
In a post on Facebook, Kimberley shared a list of 15 criticisms that her one-time date had sent her.
"Hello Kimberley, I know we went on a date quite a while ago but I’d like to explain why I haven’t messaged you," the message begins. "I feel like you could have made the date much better, here’s a few reasons why. I apologize if I offend you."
Aaaand it's all downhill from there:
"If you lost some weight, you would look incredible. Maybe about a stone or so. You are very pale. I know you aren’t a fan of the sun but a bit of fake tan won’t hurt. You have quite big boobs so you should show your off cleavage [sic] more. I think you need to wear clothes that suit your figure and maybe update your style slightly. Just so I’m not embarrassed to be seen with you."
Had enough yet? It gets worse.
"You need to dye your hair a normal colour and add extensions. Longer hair is much more attractive. You need to look more natural, stop wearing makeup. Just make yourself look decent but don't overkill it. Your lips have gone down so you should think of getting more filler. I know you said you regretted it but filler would make you look sexier.
"You need so much more confidence, confidence is sexy! The fact you take things slow makes you look like a prude."
And here's the best bit: "I didn’t get a kiss which messed with my ego. Be more sensitive to others feelings [sic]."
BUT THERE'S STILL MORE.
"When we had food I know you got a salad but having full fat coke is more calories you really don’t need. You need to keep your past to a minimum. I don’t care about it and what you went through. Get a sense of humour, you didn’t laugh at a single one of my jokes. You just seemed a bit stuck up. Sort your personality our. You made me feel s**t when you offered to pay. It’s like you thought I didn’t have enough money after telling you how much is in my account.
"You didn’t compliment me once.
"If you take these on board I might consider another date. I will give you a month and get back in touch to see if this made a difference. Good day to you Kimberley."
... Wow.
What do you even say to this? There isn't anything you can say, really - apart from this: Kimberley, you made a lucky escape.
