On Ellen DeGeneres' daytime talk show, she often surprises people with a heartwarming present: an 11-year old singer got a visit from Idina Menzel, a "funky white sister" got to perform Work It with Missy Elliott, a pair of mother and daughter superfans got a trip to Los Angeles to see a taping of the show - you get the idea.

[[twitterwidget||https://twitter.com/TheEllenShow/status/824015081079848960]]

The segments make for captivating television, and now they've inspired a hilarious meme: Twitter users imagine themselves as guests on Ellen's show, where they express their deepest desire. No matter how dark or gruesome, she grants their wish like a benevolent god, and they tear up with gratitude. Here are some highlights:

Drown your sorrows

[[twitterwidget||https://twitter.com/darlingadora/status/1101876910315823104]]

Congratulations!

[[twitterwidget||https://twitter.com/griiffinskane/status/1102847900420325377]]

Go ahead and shake hands

[[twitterwidget||https://twitter.com/cavedevice/status/836124027030761473]]

Wonder if he'll apologize for Song Of The South

[[twitterwidget||https://twitter.com/_justmateo_/status/1102771811538911232]]

Therapy is important

[[twitterwidget||https://twitter.com/unwhcretunately/status/1102902468596457472]]

iT wAs aN iNsIdE jOb

[[twitterwidget||https://twitter.com/herbz1996/status/1102698134986211332]]

I love the smell of napalm in the morning

[[twitterwidget||https://twitter.com/cowboink/status/1102652136599388160]]

Who's hungry?

[[twitterwidget||https://twitter.com/ariwannii/status/1102970007015829505]]

"That is not dead which can eternal lie

And with strange aeons even death may die"

[[twitterwidget||https://twitter.com/UnifierLyone/status/1102406375597113344]]

"Scientists are liars!" - anti-vaxxers, probably

[[twitterwidget||https://twitter.com/catraIovesgirIs/status/1101595998709866496]]

Gotta collect them all

[[twitterwidget||https://twitter.com/heyitsbunker/status/1102981700835979265]]

Justice at last

[[twitterwidget||https://twitter.com/refreshingslurp/status/1102531045931606017]]

Won't kill Princess Leia though

[[twitterwidget||https://twitter.com/vwegs/status/1102452220421988353]]

It's getting meta

[[twitterwidget||https://twitter.com/hithereimlex/status/1102287991618367488]]

She has powers we don't understand

[[twitterwidget||https://twitter.com/melmadara/status/1102353664486842368]]

Just don't bring out Mater

[[twitterwidget||https://twitter.com/rcven/status/1101533713534537729]]

I knew it!

[[twitterwidget||https://twitter.com/NEHumaneSociety/status/1102766474182168584]]

Ellen has not publicly acknowledged the meme yet, but she must be aware of it, as an omniscient, magical being. Bring forth the Old Ones!

The 'me on Ellen' meme turns Ellen's generosity into hilariously dark comedy