Jennette McCurdy has recalled a distressing incident in which she was yelled at whilst filming her first kiss.
The 30-year-old iCarly star revealed in her recent memoir, I'm Glad My Mom Died, that she had a number of confronting experiences during her time working for Nickelodeon.
McCurdy starred in two Nickelodeon shows - Sam and Cat and iCarly - and it was during filming of the latter where a man she refers to only as "The Creator," yelled at her while she was acting out her very first kiss with co-star, Nathan Kress.
iCarly was one of Nickelodeon's most popular series and lasted six seasons from 2007 - 2012. The show followed the lives of teens Carly (Miranda Cosgrove), Sam (Jennette McCurdy), and Freddie (Nathan Kress) as they launched a successful web series, iCarly.
McCurdy's and Kress' characters had a love-hate relationship that briefly resulted in romance in the second season.
The kiss was McCurdy's first in real life and on-set, and she recalled it being stressful and nerve-wracking.
"Our lips are touching," she recalled in her memoir, per Yahoo. "He's moving his mouth around a bit, but I can't move mine. I'm frozen. His eyes are closed. Mine aren't. Mine are wide open, staring at him," she wrote.
"It's so odd, staring at a person while your faces are touching. I don't like it. I can smell his hair gel," McCurdy continued.
The actress, who has since announced her retirement from acting, recounted how "The Creator" yelled directions to her off-camera: "'Move your head around a bit more, Jennette!' The Creator yells from off-camera."
"My mind is saying who cares that this is your first kiss, that your first kiss is on-camera. Get it over with. Do what you're told," she wrote. "My body is saying no, I don't want this. I don't want my first kiss to be like this. I want my first kiss to be a real first kiss, not a kiss for a TV show."
McCurdy further described her embarrassment over the situation, writing in her memoir that she was "embarrassed" by her romantic side as her mother, Debra, actively discouraged it, Insider reports.
Her inexperience made the situation all the more nerve-wracking: "You try to just go with it, and if you're Nathan, my costar, it seems like you can. But if you're me, you can't."
"If you're me, you're just thinking about every single little thing that's happening, and your mind is racing, and you can't wait for it to be over with," she wrote.
McCurdy's memoir continues with more confronting instances of when "The Creator" yelled at her, stating that it eventually became evident from "his tone" that he wasn't happy with how the scene looked.
As previously reported, the man at the center of McCurdy's current and previous allegations during her time at Nickelodeon appears to be Dan Schneider - a producer who worked on both the Nickelodeon shows that McCurdy starred in.
Though McCurdy only refers to the person who exploited her during her employment on the kid's channel as "The Creator", many media outlets and internet users believe she is referring to Schneider - though, this is currently only speculation and has not been confirmed.
The Tab reported that Schneider would "angrily email and text child actors" which resulted in complaints against him for "abusive behavior."
One twitter user wrote: "In Jennette McCurdy’s new book it is revealed that 'The Creator' is indeed Dan Schneider, who she is referring on Page 117. 'I even have the name [picked] out. Just Puckett. [Isn't] that a fun name for your own show? Dan asks with a smirk [sic].'"
Speaking of the claims against Schneider, a 2021 New York Times article wrote that Nickelodeon ended up distancing themselves from the producer, who was accused of verbally abusing and "sexualizing" young actors.
In response, Schneider is quoted to have said that these accusations were "ridiculous lies," stating: "The comedy was totally innocent. I couldn't, and I wouldn't have the long-term friendships and continued loyalty from so many reputable people if I'd mistreated my actors of any age, especially minors," VT reported.
McCurdy's memoir, I'm Glad My Mom Died, has been met with positive reviews - selling out on Amazon and even becoming a New York Times bestseller since its release on August 9, per Forbes.
