A single woman has penned a lengthy essay about why it's an "instant turn off" when men don't pay for first dates - so much so, that if they ask to do Dutch, she won't see them again!
Sydney radio producer Jana Hocking has revealed why she believes men should pay for first dates, citing the wage-gap, biology, and good old fashioned chivalry.
This man presented a PowerPoint to a woman he wanted to "hypothetically date":"I’ve liked perfectly lovely guys, but if they've gone tight on a bill, I am instantly turned off," she wrote in an essay for news.com.au.
"Over the weekend I went out with a bloke and was chuffed when he made a big deal about paying the bill. It was assertive and manly, and kind of a turn on. It also said in no uncertain terms that he enjoyed the date and was willing to invest."
She then explained that her opinion was backed up by science, citing the work of biological anthropologist and senior research fellow at the Kinsey Institute at Indiana University Bloomington, Helen Fisher, who wrote in the Wall Street Journal: "Women want to know if a man will spend his resources on her."
"For millions of years they needed a partner to provide for their young, and they keep looking for that signal."
Jana explained that, for her, it's all about the gesture, and she wouldn't be put off in the slightest if a man couldn't afford a fancy date.
"If you can't afford a big expensive wine bar, there is absolutely nothing wrong with a cute pub. Lord, make it fun and let's meet at happy hour," she wrote. "I used to date a bloke and we regularly went to his local happy hour for $1 oysters and far too many white wines. Best $50 ever spent.
"Or during another first date, a guy met me at the park with a bottle of wine, some fancy chips, and a picnic blanket. One of the best dates I've ever been on."
Jana explained that if, at the end of a date, a man wants to go Dutch on the bill, then, for her, it's a surefire sign that he doesn't want the would-be romance to go any further.
"You know straight away if the guy goes Dutch then he is more than likely not very uninterested in the date going further," she wrote.
"I clearly remember being on a date with a guy I thought I might quite like, but when he really stared at my purse as the bill came and wouldn't even reach for his own until I had placed my card on the bill tray first," she wrote. "It left a bad taste in my mouth. Would he always be like this? Counting his pennies."
What do you think? Should men pay for the first date, or is this an outdated heteronormative practice that should be consigned to the history books?
