Graysexuality is a particular identity challenging the modern understanding of sexual orientation, and more people are beginning to embrace the label.
Defined as experiencing limited amounts of sexual attraction, which can vary in intensity, graysexuality sits between being asexual, which is little to no sexual attraction, and allosexual, which is frequent sexual attraction.
Also known as gray-A or gray-ace, the term reinforces the idea that sexuality isn’t black or white - there’s a “gray area” that applies to some people.
According to WebMD, graysexual individuals experience attraction rarely or at a low intensity, which may be so minimal that it’s not a priority in relationships.
While asexuality involves little to no sexual attraction, graysexuality allows for infrequent or low-intensity attraction.
Healthline clarifies the difference between sexual attraction and libido (or sex drive). Libido refers to the physical urge for sex, while sexual attraction is the desire to connect intimately with someone based on their appeal.
The graysexual spectrum also includes being demisexual, a term for people who can experience strong attraction, but only after forming a close emotional bond. This is different from graysexuality, where attraction may occur infrequently and without emotional connection.
In dating and relationships, graysexual people may still enjoy sex, for fun, intimacy, pregnancy, or experimentation, but may not prioritise it in the same way others do.
Affection might be shown through cuddling, talking, or acts of care. As with any identity, no two people are the same, and experiences can fluctuate over time.
This fluidity in attraction mirrors experiences in other lesser-known orientations, such as abrosexuality - when sexual or romantic attraction shifts over time.
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Emma Flint, who came out as abrosexual after three decades of self-discovery, explained: "I didn’t learn about abrosexuality until two years ago, when I was 30. Up until that point, I’d struggled to identify what my sexuality was because it fluctuated so rapidly," per Metro.
For years, she tried fitting into conventional labels, sometimes feeling “like a lesbian” one day and bisexual the next, before realising: "My sexuality was fluid."
While many were supportive, some reacted with confusion. One friend texted: "When did you decide this? Is this even a label - I’ve never heard of it. I support you, obviously, but this doesn’t sound real." Others dismissed her as “confused” or told her to “just say you’re bisexual and be done with it.”
Emma responded: “I refuse to be boxed in by someone else’s limited knowledge. We’re all learning new things about ourselves all the time – that’s what growth and development is about.”
As more people identify as graysexual, abrosexual, or within other underrepresented orientations, advocates say awareness and respect are key.
Emma summed up the sentiment many in these communities share: “I’m no longer nervous about my sexuality because it makes sense to me, and in the end, that’s all that really matters.”