Tinder, like the majority of online
applications, is a very hit-and-miss endeavor. While the odd person waxes lyrical about dating in the modern age, citing their new
as proof that it
can
work out beautifully, for most of us, we have to kiss numerous frogs in order for a veritable Prince Charming to materialize.
Certainly, it's easy to become rather disillusioned scrolling through platforms such as Tinder and Bumble.
I mean, I don't know about you, but reading half a dozen cringe-inducing bios is enough to put me off the search of love for months to come.
But before it even gets to stage where you're meeting a potential love interest, they have to pass the initial hurdle: the first message.
Yes, if you've ever spent any time on
apps, you'll be familiar with some rather terrible messages. And they all tend to follow the same pattern.
1. The generic copy-and-paste message
Most women have received the incredibly impersonal, copy-pasted message before. These messages tend to be generic, and normally feature one or two quick facts about the person in question. Now, while men clearly think this is an ingenious approach, women can tell straight away when they're on the receiving end of this kind of message. And we normally just end up deleting it immediately.
2. The overly complimentary message
Sure, it's nice to be told that you're attractive, but on dating platforms such as Tinder, everyone thinks this is a sure-fire way to get a date, and that is not the case. Women care much more about genuineness, and as such, we prefer it when we get a message that's specifically tailored to our personality and interests, which we elaborated on in the bio.
The angry message is an unfortunate inevitability of using dating apps. And nearly everyone has experienced it at some point or the other. It normally happens when women decide not to respond to a man's message, which is completely her prerogative. Some men, however, don't take it that way and choose to send an aggrieved message which normally contains an insult about the woman's body or age. While it's normal to feel disappointed after being blanked in this manner, it's never ok to lash out at someone for not choosing to reply to you.
Striking up a conversation simply by saying "hi" or "hey" is not the best approach if you want to learn something meaningful about the person in question. Oh, and you also end up looking lazy.
5. The sexually explicit message
Unless she's specifically asked for it, sending a woman a sexual message on a dating app is a sure-fire way to ensure you get blocked. Not only does it make the recipient uncomfortable, but it also sets the tone for the entire exchange, which will most likely not take off. And whilst you may only be on Tinder for a quick hookup, it's important to acknowledge that others are using it more seriously. So next time you've got your swipe game on, try to avoid using slurs, explicit language or saying anything remotely sexual.
At the end of the day, you have to remember that this is the first interaction you're having with someone, and as such you don't want to scare them away prematurely. Talking about your exes, or how your last few dates have gone is never a good idea. But do you want to know what's worse? Divulging details about some traumatic incident that happened in your childhood, or what exactly bugs you so much about your mother. Keep it light with some mindless chatter about travel, films and books.
This should be pretty self-explanatory. Sending someone this "kissing" emoji not only looks lazy, but it instantly brands you as childish. Safe to say, it's not a good look.
Well, there you have it. It's a good idea to avoid these seven things if you want to up your chances of getting a reply. Who knows, some extra thought may even land you the woman of your dreams.
