12 Of the highest-calorie meals you can order at your favorite fast food joints

Here at Food Envy, we're all about the food. That's a given, of course, but I think we also like to talk to you about how to eat so that you don't die. So there's usually a tip or trick about how your favourite celebrity stays in shape, or how to keep your waistline down in time for summer.

But sometimes, it's just important to talk about some delicious fast food.

Pizza, burgers, ice cream and fries are what we hang around for, so on this occasion, I'd like to tickle your tastebuds by talking about the highest-calorie meals you can get at each of your favourite fast food joints. I don't know about you, but high-calorie tends to translate to delicious, so I'm very, very excited.

We start this journey through the world of fast food with Arby's, whose signature is the roast beef sandwich. But if one dead animal wasn't enough for you at Arby's, the Triple Decker Sandwich may be much more your speed. With oven-roasted turkey breast, pit-smoked ham, roast beef, pepper bacon, Swiss cheese, cheddar, mayonnaise, spicy brown mustard, onions, tomato, and lettuce (all on toasted honey wheat bread), this is the highest-calorie thing you can get at Arby's, and it shows.

Next up, it's Burger King, and with the Rodeo King and its 1,250 calories, we're not messing around one bit. If you're trying to lose weight, you might eat around 1,250 calories a day, but the only way you're going to lose weight eating the Rodeo King Sandwich is if your foot falls off from diabetes. We're looking at two flame-grilled beef patties that weigh around half a pound, thick-cut bacon, onion rings, barbecue sauce and mayonnaise - topped off with American cheese. Pure bliss.

The Guacamole Bacon Thickburger has 1,200 calories - just a few less than the Rodeo King Sandwich up there - but that's where the similarities end. Well, apart from the half pound of beef - this one's got bacon, pepperjack cheese, and Santa Fe sauce and guacamole, of course. Finished off with a bun with lettuce, tomato and red onion, it's an interesting avocado twist on the Angus beef staple.

You don't usually associate Chick Fil A with high-calorie decadence, so it's kind of expected that their highest-calorie is not a buttload of chicken or a huge burger, but a breakfast item. Wow, who would have thought? The Hashbrown Scramble Burrito may only be available at certain times of the day, but it's absolutely worth a try: sliced nuggets, cheese, scrambled eggs and hash brown, filling out at 680 calories. Not bad.

Whoa there, Dairy Queen! As the premier place to get incredible ice cream, you'd think that the most calorific thing on the menu out there would be some incredible banana split, but nope! It's sometimes easy to forget Dairy Queen's meals are just as delicious as their Blizzards, but I don't think you'll forget the Honey Hot Glazed Chicken Strip Basket in a hurry. 1,600 calories all by its lonesome: no fries allowed. No, seriously. That'll probably kill you.

With burgers and hot dogs all over the place, Five Guys isn't exactly a haven of healthy eating - but as calorific as all the burgers are, a large serving of french fries has more than anything else on the menu. For all the ladies out there; if you have the large fries with a plain burger and bun at 450 calories, you've already had your recommended daily allowance of calories. In one meal.

We've seen quarter-pound and half-pound burgers, but have you ever seen a two-third pound of beef between buns? Hardee's are the mad geniuses behind this burger beemoth, and with 1,300 calories, four stripes of bacon and three slices of cheese all topped with mayo, I'm having a heart attack just looking at this burger.

You might remember a jack-in-the-box as a little toy you'd play with when you were very young, but the Sirloin Swiss and Grilled Onion Burger at Jack In The Box is not here to play. It's here to clog your arteries. Even better, there are no frills involved with this burger: brioche bun, sirloin beef, Swiss cheese, grilled onions, lettuce, tomato, pickles, and Peppercorn Mayo. Get me three.

Why hello there, KFC. Although you'd be forgiven for thinking the Original Recipe chicken was the highest-calorie option on the menu as well as its most famous, but tied at 720 calories, the answer you're looking for is the Famous Bowl or the Chicken Pot Pie. You've all heard of a chicken pot pie, so I'm going to talk about the Famous Bowl: fried chicken, mashed potato, corn, gravy, with three different cheeses mixed in. I want to buy enough Famous Bowls to fill a bathtub.

Finally, McDonald's joins the party. While you've got the Quarter Pounder with Cheese and the Grand Big Mac, nothing on the regular menu matches up calorifically to the Big Breakfast with HotCakes, which has a heart-stopping 1,350 calories. What have we got here? Biscuits, sausage, scrambled eggs, hash browns, and hotcakes, and you're going to have to excuse me because I have just drooled over my laptop and need to find some napkins.

Although Subway made its name as a healthier alternative to the fast food options out there at the time (we won't talk about Jared), if you really want to give your heart the chance to really get a workout, you could do a whole lot worse than the Chicken Bacon and Ranch Melt. With 1,190 calories of Monterey Cheddar cheese and a whole lot of bread, this is going to be one footlong you'll never forget.

Before we sign off here, let's have a look at Wendy's, whose calorific entry is the Dave's Triple Cheeseburger. It's got three beef patties, layered with cheese. I'm sorry if I don't come across as enthusiastic about this one: I'm just so hungry and I really need one inside me. My bad.

Well, you guys: I don't know about you, but I need one of each of these on my plate, soon as possible. Sorry to my doctor in advance.