A brothel manager has exposed the most "stupid" mistakes that give away men who visit sex workers behind their partners' backs.
Catherine DeNoire, who has managed one of Europe’s largest brothels for nearly a decade.
The 31-year-old works the night shift, clocking in at 7PM, while pursuing a PhD in organizational psychology by day, PEOPLE reported.
She’s part of a large team of full-time staff, including departments like HR, accounting, marketing, and maintenance, all operating within the same building, though her schedule means she rarely crosses paths with them.
As a manager, she coordinates with sex workers, who are independent contractors. They determine their schedules and their salaries, and have the right to refuse service to any customers.
In a recent interview with News.com.au, DeNoire revealed that men are regularly caught by their partners when they leave their phone’s location services on or withdraw money from a shared bank account at the brothel ATM.
“It sounds like a no-brainer, but lots of men stop thinking clearly once they enter a brothel. Common sense just disappears," she said.
While some clients are careless, others are remarkably calculated. “They’ll come during their lunch break from work, leave their phone at the office just in case - especially if they have shared location on or tracking history on, which would look suspicious if he suddenly turned it off - and then just say they had an important client meeting,” she said.
“They always bring cash, never withdraw money nearby, keep no receipts or entry tickets, and they take a shower after the session so there’s no scent or trace," she added.
Even with tight planning, some still get caught. DeNoire recalled one woman demanding to see CCTV footage after finding a brothel ticket in her fiancé’s pocket just one week before their wedding.
“Their wedding was just a week away, and she wanted to know if he had really been here. She asked me to show her all the security footage from the day in question, to confirm whether he had visited or not," the manager said.
“I can’t just let random people into the office and show them our CCTV footage," she continued. “I explained that to them, but the fiancée took it as me covering for him, and she said there would be no wedding."
The manager said such confrontations aren’t rare. Partners sometimes show up knowing their significant other is inside, and the couple argues outside after the confrontation.
Reactions vary, but DeNoire said men often resort to the same defensive scripts. “He’s shocked and immediately starts apologising, claiming he didn’t do anything, that his friends dragged him there, that he was just waiting at the bar, or that he only came for a drink and this was the only place still open,” she said.
But not all men play the apology card: “Once, I saw a guy flip it completely. His partner confronted him, and he got mad at her for stalking him and acting like a jealous psycho. That was really something else.”
DeNoire shared that the reasons why men visit brothels are not always rooted in unhappiness.
“Some men are in happy marriages - they love their wives, but the sex is gone,” she explained. “They don’t want to pressure their partner into something she doesn’t want, but they also see affairs as more emotionally risky than visiting a professional.”
Others, she said, are exploring fantasies like BDSM, they’re ashamed to bring up at home. Some simply want someone to talk to, using their session more like therapy.
“And then there are men for whom this is just part of their lifestyle,” she said. “Even if everything is ‘okay’ at home, they still want to feel like champions, like they’re wanted and desired.”
So is it cheating? DeNoire doesn’t claim to know. “I have no idea what goes on behind closed doors in their relationship, what kind of boundaries or agreements they have,” she said.
“I don’t want to automatically assume that every man with a wedding ring is cheating and a jerk - some couples do have open relationships and are perfectly happy that way," she explained.