Couples in happy relationships reveal how often they are having sex per week

A group of happy-clapping couples has shared how often they have sex, and the answers show there’s no single “normal,” with habits differing widely from relationship to relationship.

While intimacy can play an important role in a partnership, there’s no fixed number that defines whether a relationship is healthy or fulfilling. For some, sex several times a week feels right, while others are perfectly content with once every couple of weeks or even monthly.

What do the 'sexperts' say?

Psychosexual therapist Kate Moyle explained that frequency alone doesn’t tell the full story: “Sex can be an important part of a healthy relationship, but it’s not a total barometer for relationship health or satisfaction, and a sole focus on regularity of sex tells us nothing about the quality or satisfaction of those having it.”

She added, “While there are well-documented health benefits of sex, such as neurochemical release and an increased sense of closeness, this is moderated by the sex being wanted and enjoyable. Often, couples who feel emotionally close report getting more from sex, and vice versa: when sex is good, they feel more connected and closer.”

“There is a bi-directional relationship at play, but there is no universal benchmark or standard to aim for – your sex life is impacted by everything else in your life,” she said.

Couples discuss their sex schedules

To explore this further, several couples spoke about their respective coital routines, revealing how factors like work, children, and lifestyle shape their sex lives and general intimacy.

One couple, both aged 32 and together for eight years, said they usually have sex once a week, though busy periods can mean going up to two weeks without intimacy.

Meanwhile, Elizabeth, 59, and Aaliyah, 54, who have been together for 18 months but live separately, said they have sex more than four times a week. They described having “one quality session” while their children are at school, alongside “quicker sessions” at other times.

For Jessy, 32, and Steven, 46, once a month is enough. They attribute this to working “crazy long hours” and stress that it’s not a “reflection of the love we have for one another.”

Overall, many couples said their sex lives fluctuate depending on circumstances, with busy schedules often getting in the way—though some find early mornings a practical solution.

Sexologist Dr Tara Suwinyattichaiporn also pointed out why consistency can be difficult, explaining: “Many factors come into play when it comes to reduced sexual frequency in relationships, such as familiarity, lack of prioritisation of sexual intimacy, children, workload, stress level, finances and sick family members, to name a few.”

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