Relationships2 min(s) read
Published 16:53 06 Dec 2020 GMT
A new mom has taken to social media to ask for advice after revealing that her mother-in-law is "offended" and "hurt" by her daughter's name.
Taking to Reddit to share her story under the handle 'Acadia_Secure', the mother shared her story in the 'Am I The A**hole' - a subforum of the social media site where users post about a recent grievance or conflict they've had and the community then votes on whether or not the original poster was in the wrong.
The 28-year-old new mom revealed that despite giving birth to her daughter in September, the "joy" of bonding with her child has been "drained" due to the fact that her mother-in-law is unhappy with the name she and her husband have chosen for their child - Fiona Anne.
The mom writes: "She is offended, hurt, and can’t let it go."
Going into more detail, the new mom writes: "The chosen middle name, 'Anne', happens to be an homage to my own grandmother.
"When we announced to the MIL in May that we were calling our baby girl 'Fiona Anne', she got immediately upset.
"Anne was the name of someone in her past who she was deeply hurt and betrayed by, and I guess she still holds onto that grudge. She said she would be just as hurt if we went along with our plan to include Anne in our daughter's name."
The mom continues: "At the time, I was very pregnant and pissed off and sassy, and I pretty much told her she’d have to get over it and be excited for new context to be added to the name. And that was that... until my daughter was born."
Since their daughter was born, the mother-in-law has not spoken to the new parents and blocked the mom's number.
"When I try to text her baby pictures, they are never 'delivered'. She has been talking to people close to us about how hurt she is," the new mom writes. "She will not directly address this with us, but we have heard from my brother and sister in-laws that my MIL is beside herself over this.
"She thinks I chose the name on purpose as some kind of a power move, or slight to her, which is just not true. All I wanted was to include my grandmother's name in my daughter's name because that’s always been important to me."
In an update to the original post, the mom revealed that "evil Anne" was her mother-in-law's "own evil MIL".
She continues: "They had a huge falling out following a messy divorce 25 years ago. However, my husband has no contact with that side of the family and no memories of 'evil Anne' due to estrangement and the fact that they live an ocean away.
"So to him, Anne didn’t strike a bad chord. He barely knew about this deep resentment for his grandmother until we brought up the name in the spring."
As of this writing, the post has received over 3.1K upvotes on the site, and more than 400 comments from other Redditors providing their advice.
For example, user 'Prncssme' responded: "NTA [not the a**hole]. It's a middle name, for heaven's sake. Your MIL has the association, not you or your husband (I assume).
"If she’s willing to throw away a relationship with her grandchild and her son because of a name association, she's got some seriously disordered thinking."
Another user wrote: "NTA this lady sounds extremely self-centered. Anne is also a very common middle name. Me and my mom both have Ann as our middle names.
"Honestly, good riddance. She decided to make a joyful time all about herself. Good riddance, OP. If she's cutting out her grandchild over some ancient feud with some entirely irrelevant rando then you don't need her in your life at all."
And a third replied: "NTA your MIL sounds way too precious. She needs to learn not everything is about her. And to still be on about whatever this betrayal was years later, she needs to let things go. Its your child and your choice on names."
What would you do in this situation?
