You'd think that finding a romantic partner would be easy. Thanks to today's dating apps, there are an infinite supply of options available at the flick of a finger. But unfortunately, the more options we have, the more fickle we are, rejecting tons of potential lovers just because we don't like their photo, occupation or favorite movie. As the rejections pile up, you drown in your loneliness, cynical that you'll ever find love.
However, sometimes those crestfallen feelings can fuel inspiration. Michael James Schneider is a 44-year-old artist and photographer in Portland, Oregon. After a bad break-up at the end of 2015, he's unable to find someone new. "I usually mark art from leaning into and embracing the most humiliating parts of my life," Michael told Metro UK. "When I’m single and lonely and drinking… well why not create a companion out of that loneliness?"
So, Michael did what most lonely single people do: try to find comfort in sweet, sweet alcohol. But not in the way you might expect. He constructed a boyfriend out of boxed wine. It was a long, complicated process. He bought a human-sized armature, which is a metal framework typically used for molding a sculpture. Then he put a bunch of wine boxes on it. Okay, so it wasn't a long, complicated process. But the artist did an exceptional job, and took some hilarious photos of their adventures as a couple.
The boyfriend even has a name, inspired by one of the most popular brands of boxed wine. "His name is Franz," says Michael. "He’s not German, he’s from all over, a blend if you will. He’s an idealized, loving, sweet boyfriend." And the best part is, he'll never argue with you or break up with you. Scoff if you want, but after more years on the dating scene, you might be dating boxed wine as well.
Michael took his new love out for a photoshoot, and the pictures have been shared more than 5,000 times on social media. The couple posed while doing everyday activities - cooking spaghetti in the kitchen, reading the newspaper in bed and shopping at the grocery store. "Even during the shoot in the grocery store, the locals hardly batted an eye: we’re used to weird things in Portland," says Michael.
After Boxed Wine Boyfriend got such a warm response online, he said he plans to let the good times flow. ‘The reception has been so great that I can imagine further adventures in the relationship," says Michael. "What happens when Box Wine Boyfriend meets my friends? Moves in with me? What if there are wedding bells in the future?" That would be exciting, but as you can see in the bedroom photo, Michael has a cat named Ned. We all know how cats love to play with boxes, so it's possible Ned will murder Franz one day. But we wish the couple the best.
So, after you get ghosted on Tindr for the 50th time, you might want to consider a creative solution. Boxed Wine Boyfriend: When your love life hits a new Merlot.