Woman who had sex with her husband every day for a year revealed how it impacted their marriage

A woman has admitted that she conceived an unusual idea for her husband’s 40th birthday: she proposed that they have sex every day for an entire year as a gift, personal experiment, and a way in which they could improve their relationship and sex life.

Charla Muller, who had been married to her husband Brad for eight years at the time, was short of inspiration when it came to gift ideas for his milestone birthday.

With the stereotypical socks, mugs, and alcoholic beverages failing to meet the occasion's requirements, she ultimately decided that committing to daily intimacy for 365 days would be her surprise.

Unwrapping an intimate surprise

To her dismay, when she revealed all, his reaction wasn’t what she expected. While many would jump at the opportunity to get down and dirty with their other half, Charla confessed: “He turned me down!”

Speaking to the Guardian, Charla added: “He thought that scheduling time for intimacy would detract from its loveliness.”

Yet, it wasn’t just the lack of sentiment that Brad took issue with; he was also unsure whether they could realistically stick to the plan and if he had the capacity to deliver. “He also wondered if he was up to it. He said, ‘What would happen if I have a headache?’”

After a while, he agreed to “give it a go,” but only once they had set some ground rules… the key to any romantic arrangement. Among them was the understanding that either person could opt out on a given day if they genuinely weren’t feeling up to it.

The couple quickly realized that making such a commitment required lifestyle changes. Watching TV stopped taking priority, work distractions needed to be switched off, and they had to be more disciplined about their children’s schedules, which had to align, so that they could make time for each other and their setup.

The logistics of their intimate arrangement

Although the goal was daily intimacy, real life occasionally got in the way. Business trips and other such obligations meant they didn’t manage to adhere to their sexual agreement every single day. However, they were intimate far more frequently than before.

Charla admitted that before the experiment, their sex life had declined. Once they began, though, she said it felt “as if we were dating again.” She added, “The unintended beauty of my gift was its unconditionality. There was no need for Brad to wine and dine me at overpriced restaurants.”

She also noticed positive changes in their household dynamic: “Our house ran better because we were more agreeable, more helpful, more solicitous to each other, and our time together was truly about us, not the promise of special date-night sex.”

Toward the end of the year, they admitted they were sometimes “going through the motions,” but still felt it remained “a good way of connecting.”

By the time the year wrapped up, they felt their marriage had grown stronger. Charla, who later penned a book about the experience titled 365 Nights, said she was “giddy with the notion that I didn't have to have sex” once the challenge was complete. In the aftermath, she found they were “much more relaxed with each other,” and their home was no longer “full of unspoken tension.”

In the end, while they didn’t quite achieve intimacy every single day, their relationship improved drastically, though it might not be a birthday gift everyone would want to copy.

Featured Image. Credit: TedX Talks