The most optimistic possible interpretation of my lack of a Hogwarts letter centers around the most inept postal system known to man, being as it is 16 years late now.
Seeing as any other explanation is simply unpalatable, that's my line and I'm sticking to it.
So yes, more than 20 years on from the release of the book Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone, which ushered in two decades and counting of pure Potter-mania all over the globe, I'm still waiting for my turn to attend Hogwarts.
Meet the woman who remembers the Harry Potter series word-for-word:While that particular pipe dream may never come true, it doesn't mean that we all can't still enjoy the trappings of the wizarding world.
Potter attractions have popped up all over the world in the intervening years since JK Rowling first introduced us to the boy wizard. There's the studio tour in Leavesden, just outside London, which sees fans come face-to-face with original sets from the Harry Potter movies, and of course the incredible Potter theme parks.
Now, what these attractions have had in common up until now, is that they've been some of the only places to sample the famous non-alcoholic wizarding drink, Butterbeer.
This is all about to change though, after Warner Bros. announced that Potter fans in the United Kingdom can now purchase the delicious beverage from the comfort of their own homes.
What's more, the butterscotch-flavor drink is entirely vegan and comes in beautifully designed bottles with different collectible labels.
A product description for the Butterbeer reads:
"Experience one of the Wizarding-World's most loved drinks with bottled Butterbeer. Serve the delicious drink chilled and poured from the bottle. The beverage features the familiar butterscotch flavour fans will recognise among other secret ingredients, making it the perfect gift for aspiring wizards and witches. Brewed in the UK, Butterbeer is available to buy in souvenir glass bottles with a collectable label designed by MinaLima."
The bottled Butterbeer is available to buy at the afore-mentioned Warner Bros. Harry Potter Studio Tour London, at the Platform 9 3/4 Shop in Kings Cross Station in London, Heathrow Airport and Gatwick Airpot (though the latter store is currently closed).
Thirsty shoppers are also now able to order online at shop.wbstudiotour.co.uk or harrypotterplatform934.com, though delivery is currently only available within the United Kingdom.