Man considering divorcing wife because she won't let him hold their newborn baby

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By Asiya Ali

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A new father has revealed that he may be heading for a divorce because his wife is refusing to let him hold their baby.

As a new mom, feeling extremely protective over letting other people hold your tiny, fragile newborn is natural.

However, it's a whole other story when you feel anxious about the father - whom you share a child with - holding your baby due to his clumsy behavior, and fears that he might even drop them.

Due to this, an unnamed 33-year-old man has revealed on Reddit's Am I The A**hole forum that he is considering divorcing his 31-year-old wife due to her apprehensions about his parenting.

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The father claimed that his wife doesn't let him hold their newborn because of his "clumsy" behavior. Credit: Stephen Zeigler / Getty

Posting on the popular sub-platform, the man wrote: "I do drop things by accident when my hand hits it unknowingly and so I do agree with her. But it's not that bad that I'm knocking over things every day."

He said he used to "laugh" off his partner's concerns, but during her pregnancy, she allegedly remarked that she wouldn't let him carry their daughter because of how "clumsy" he was.

"Again, I laughed it off at times and sometimes when I did take it seriously I told her there's a difference between knocking over the TV remote and dropping a kid from your arms. Still, I did not think about it as much," he penned.

But, things became clear for him when their child was born and his wife's behavior went up a notch: "I was shocked at how reluctant she was to even let me hold the baby in the hospital," he said.

The man stated that he noticed his wife panicking when he was even around their baby, and it started causing a lot of disputes between them - which are still continuing. "It's been a couple of months and I have not been able to hold my baby more than thrice including once when I held her at the hospital," he complained.

His partner now sleeps in a different bedroom with their infant and doesn't even let the man hold their child, even if he is sitting down.

"She almost never leaves our daughter alone with me," he said desperately, adding that he even suggested using a child carrier so he could take her to the park and they could go for walks together. However, the mom shot this down by countering that he would trip over and fall face-first.

He thought his wife was overreacting, and even suggested they went to therapy together, however, she told him that "talking won't fix [his] body," which led to him feeling very "self-conscious".

"Every time I mess up doing something, she tells me that it's proof that what she's saying is right," he wrote.

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The desperate father alleged that his partner doesn't even trust him with a child carrier. Credit: FreshSplash / Getty

The new dad shared that he's usually a calm person and had tried to reason with his partner many times, but he is at his wits' end with what to do.

He tried to sneak into his daughter's bedroom when his wife was asleep, but this triggered a huge fight. "She screamed at first and then told me to leave the room immediately," the father recalled.

"I told her that I was not going to hold her and that I was just there to see her and hold her hand. She didn't believe me and accused me of being ignorant and selfish. I did lose my temper too and I offloaded these entire two months of frustration onto her," he added.

The fallout of their huge row has resulted in the man now staying in a hotel and contemplating getting a divorce to leave his wife alone as he feels it’s clear that she doesn’t want him around.

He concluded: "I feel terrible about how I acted that night. I cannot seem to get over any of what has happened. And even though it hurts so much, I think I am going to part ways."

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"I think I am going to part ways," the man wrote on Reddit. Credit: Bymuratdeniz / Getty

There were many commenters on the heartbreaking post, many of whom expressed their concern over his wife's mental health.

"Your wife is showing some concerning signs of postpartum anxiety," one person wrote. "I’d give your health visitor/midwife/doctor a call and express your concerns before the anxiety manifests itself in more harmful ways. Although preventing a father from bonding and caring for his child is harmful already."

A second person agreed and urged him to get medical help for his partner: "Please call your wife’s doctor. This extremely controlling behavior is based on faulty logic and is a sign of a postpartum mental health problem."

A third person shared their own experience, penning: "I hope this doesn't get buried. I WAS your wife, after and before I had my child with untreated mental illness related to the baby, so I'm saying this with all my heart to you, PLEASE HELP HER. HELP HER TO HELP THEM BOTH.

"My husband almost left, several times, but got me help instead....There might be no way to help your wife, but she is obviously sick and she and your baby need you more than they know or are able to express," they added.

It looks like divorce might be off the table as the dad responded to the flood of messages from commenters recommending him to help his wife get medical attention by saying: "I won't be leaving her and I will try my best to help her. [I know] it's tough but I'll try my best."

Featured image credit: Miodrag Ignjatovic / Getty

Man considering divorcing wife because she won't let him hold their newborn baby

vt-author-image

By Asiya Ali

Article saved!Article saved!

A new father has revealed that he may be heading for a divorce because his wife is refusing to let him hold their baby.

As a new mom, feeling extremely protective over letting other people hold your tiny, fragile newborn is natural.

However, it's a whole other story when you feel anxious about the father - whom you share a child with - holding your baby due to his clumsy behavior, and fears that he might even drop them.

Due to this, an unnamed 33-year-old man has revealed on Reddit's Am I The A**hole forum that he is considering divorcing his 31-year-old wife due to her apprehensions about his parenting.

wp-image-1263238730 size-full
The father claimed that his wife doesn't let him hold their newborn because of his "clumsy" behavior. Credit: Stephen Zeigler / Getty

Posting on the popular sub-platform, the man wrote: "I do drop things by accident when my hand hits it unknowingly and so I do agree with her. But it's not that bad that I'm knocking over things every day."

He said he used to "laugh" off his partner's concerns, but during her pregnancy, she allegedly remarked that she wouldn't let him carry their daughter because of how "clumsy" he was.

"Again, I laughed it off at times and sometimes when I did take it seriously I told her there's a difference between knocking over the TV remote and dropping a kid from your arms. Still, I did not think about it as much," he penned.

But, things became clear for him when their child was born and his wife's behavior went up a notch: "I was shocked at how reluctant she was to even let me hold the baby in the hospital," he said.

The man stated that he noticed his wife panicking when he was even around their baby, and it started causing a lot of disputes between them - which are still continuing. "It's been a couple of months and I have not been able to hold my baby more than thrice including once when I held her at the hospital," he complained.

His partner now sleeps in a different bedroom with their infant and doesn't even let the man hold their child, even if he is sitting down.

"She almost never leaves our daughter alone with me," he said desperately, adding that he even suggested using a child carrier so he could take her to the park and they could go for walks together. However, the mom shot this down by countering that he would trip over and fall face-first.

He thought his wife was overreacting, and even suggested they went to therapy together, however, she told him that "talking won't fix [his] body," which led to him feeling very "self-conscious".

"Every time I mess up doing something, she tells me that it's proof that what she's saying is right," he wrote.

wp-image-1263238731 size-full
The desperate father alleged that his partner doesn't even trust him with a child carrier. Credit: FreshSplash / Getty

The new dad shared that he's usually a calm person and had tried to reason with his partner many times, but he is at his wits' end with what to do.

He tried to sneak into his daughter's bedroom when his wife was asleep, but this triggered a huge fight. "She screamed at first and then told me to leave the room immediately," the father recalled.

"I told her that I was not going to hold her and that I was just there to see her and hold her hand. She didn't believe me and accused me of being ignorant and selfish. I did lose my temper too and I offloaded these entire two months of frustration onto her," he added.

The fallout of their huge row has resulted in the man now staying in a hotel and contemplating getting a divorce to leave his wife alone as he feels it’s clear that she doesn’t want him around.

He concluded: "I feel terrible about how I acted that night. I cannot seem to get over any of what has happened. And even though it hurts so much, I think I am going to part ways."

wp-image-1263238737 size-full
"I think I am going to part ways," the man wrote on Reddit. Credit: Bymuratdeniz / Getty

There were many commenters on the heartbreaking post, many of whom expressed their concern over his wife's mental health.

"Your wife is showing some concerning signs of postpartum anxiety," one person wrote. "I’d give your health visitor/midwife/doctor a call and express your concerns before the anxiety manifests itself in more harmful ways. Although preventing a father from bonding and caring for his child is harmful already."

A second person agreed and urged him to get medical help for his partner: "Please call your wife’s doctor. This extremely controlling behavior is based on faulty logic and is a sign of a postpartum mental health problem."

A third person shared their own experience, penning: "I hope this doesn't get buried. I WAS your wife, after and before I had my child with untreated mental illness related to the baby, so I'm saying this with all my heart to you, PLEASE HELP HER. HELP HER TO HELP THEM BOTH.

"My husband almost left, several times, but got me help instead....There might be no way to help your wife, but she is obviously sick and she and your baby need you more than they know or are able to express," they added.

It looks like divorce might be off the table as the dad responded to the flood of messages from commenters recommending him to help his wife get medical attention by saying: "I won't be leaving her and I will try my best to help her. [I know] it's tough but I'll try my best."

Featured image credit: Miodrag Ignjatovic / Getty