The online dating world and communicating via messages can be a challenge for the best of us. Sometimes you'll send extremely embarro messages to the wrong number, other times you might use emojis that end up accidentally offending someone. But a lot of the time, weirdo chat up lines, unasked for pictures of private parts and outright perverse messages are not welcome, land in your message box anyway.
Come on guys, it's not that hard. Can you just not be creepy and gross and send nice, interesting questions to start a decent conversation, that doesn't end up with you feeling utterly disgusted with the human population? I mean, there are actual tips from experts about how to successfully navigate the online dating world.
Anyway, there are ways you can fend off and deflect such messages from creeps, and we've collected the best of the bunch for you to take inspiration from.
1. Two can play that game
2. Generic AND grammatically incorrect... that calls for something drastic
3. Not interested buddy
4. Enough of this small talk
5. Lol... this "cat"
6. Let's talk practicalities
7. A picture speaks a thousand words
8. Well played
9. Not really feeling it tbh
10. Be more specific about next time
11. Scare them with randomness
12. That'll freak him out...
13. Cera-ously?
These are just too good. Keep them saved in your repertoire just in case you're subject to messages of a similar nature in the future.
While the world of online dating has opened up new channels of communication that never used to be possible, it does have its downsides. For every story of someone meeting their life partner on Tinder or Bumble, there are 100 stories of unsolicited d**k pics, inappropriate language and just downright harassment.
Unfortunately, the majority of these messages come from men - who believe that they have a divine right to talk in a crude and disgusting manner to females in order to land themselves a date. However, while a large percentage of females simply ignore the messages, some do respond and it can be majestic.
Take a look at 13 of the best replies to creepy male text messages ever sent.
1. She answered the question to be fair
2. Lava or a creep? I know which I'd take
3. Well, you didn't specify
4. Very punny
5. Urm, I don't really get where this is going
6. The female BOSS
7. I wonder which part of "no" he doesn't understand - the "n" or the "o"?
8. Tinder or an English lesson? You decide
9. The perfect answer
10. She's got you sussed, Alex
11. You two would make a great couple
12. Wheeeeeey!
13. She has absolutely done you there
So there you have it, the best way to deal with creepy Tinder trolls is to clap back at them. Not only will it more than likely shut them up, but you may even achieve a certain level of internet notoriety.
We all know that dating in the 21st century is an utter minefield.
Technology has rendered the traditional face to face method of dating obsolete - at least until a few weeks of witty repartee on online dating apps has confirmed that the two parties involved might, in fact, have something in common.
While online dating and apps like Tinder might have made the initial throes of dating a little more convenient and palatable, they have also lead to the rise of unsolicited pictures and conversation that are as cringeworthy as they are unwanted.
Here, then, are some women who had the perfect response ready when they received some decidedly creepy messages from guys.
1. A second option
2. That's a great shower wall
3. It pays to be neat and tidy
4. That the sort of thing you had in mind?
5. Not quite what you wanted?
6. "oi"
7. Ducks not d*cks
8. Brutal
9. The next best thing
There's no need to play along with creepy or unwanted messages, and these women certainly had the perfect response.
Gone are the days of sending love letters to your crush and presenting flowers/chocolates/sparkly bits of jewellery to them as a token of your affection. Now, it's all dating apps, swiping right, and judging the quality of banter in your conversations before deciding whether you'd actually like to meet in person.
And while there are plenty of success stories about people who met on Tinder and the like, there are just as many tales exchanged between friends regarding the different creeps that message people with questionable opening questions, requests for "n00dz", and VERY in-your-face pictures of their own private parts, that were neither requested nor welcomed.
Some women have decided to share their responses to such unsolicited messages online, and their comebacks are hilarious. Take a look at these 17 examples – we've got a lot to learn from these women!
Anyone who's single at the moment knows that online dating is tough, and it's a such a slog because its biggest boon is also its greatest detriment. While dating apps grant you the power to match with anyone in the world, it means that you can match with anyone in the world, good or bad. Of course, we all keep swiping because we're still hopeful that we can score a dream date with the love of our life ... that's the plan anyway.
The reality, more often than not, is that some creep tries desperately to slide into your DMs. Yes, it could be an unsolicited d*ck pic, or a demand for nudes, or just a generally offensive, needless comment that turns you off. We've seen and heard them all, and quite frankly, it can be totally exasperating. But don't be depressed or upset by creepy messages. All you need is a snappy clapback at your disposal to put the creeps back in their place, and if you're not confident enough in your own abilities, then all you need to do is follow the example of people who are pros when it comes to getting rid of weirdos. Scroll down to check out some of the most savage burns ever.
1. Answering a different question
2. Perfect selfie
3. Thermostat advice
4. When you ask a stupid question...
5. Expect a stupid answer
6. Touché
7. Certainly
8. Pets are irreplaceable
9. David Icke was right
10. There are two types of people in the world
Pretty savage huh? But this isn't the first time we've curated a list like this. Check out these other 13 brutal clapbacks to creepy male text messages if you're in need of even more inspiration.
Dating in the 21st century feels at times akin to wandering blithely across a live minefield, blindfolded.
The potential pitfalls, embarrassments and jeopardy involved are simply innumerable, and frankly it's a surprise that more people don't simply denounce the whole institution and go to live in happy isolation in a forest somewhere.
In the past - one imagines - dating was a far simpler affair. Though it might seem convenient to merely swipe left and right to make decisions over potential love interests, it is undeniably a rather cosmetic approach. Gone are the days of romantic letters, of actual face-to-face meet cutes, replaced instead by an extended toilet break to swipe furiously across a phone screen.
Of course, I sound outmoded, and many would consider my views decidedly archaic, flying in the face as they do of modern technological advancements and societal changes. When miracles do happen, though, and two people actually meet up to go on a date together, the jeopardy is still not over, as these frankly bizarre texts that people received after going on a date will surely attest.
1. Let's kick off with a nice one...
2. And then immediately take a turn for the worse
3. Doesn't seem very fair
4. Giving men a bad name
5. Modern dating can be somewhat cut-throat
6. Just mates, yeah?
7. That's... That's a bit much
8. Why would anyone do that?
9. Actually a brilliant follow up text, that
10. I think that means he likes you?
11. "Private pictures" is such a weird phrase
12. Er, thanks?
13. Yeah, but seriously, /10?
14. Does this mean we're not going for a second date? Or are you a spy?
15. Let's finish with this genuinely really lovely text
What a cornucopia of text messages that was; a real mixed bag which just goes to prove that, when it comes to dating, there really is no set of hard and fast rules to follow.
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