Haircuts are always tricky territory. If you’re brave enough to peer back into the annals of Facebook, you can find terrifying testaments to the unspeakable things people have done at the barber’s.
Whether you went for the “unkempt hobbit” look, or decided to try blonde cornrows aged 15, we’ve all had a hairy experience we’ve come to regret. Most are obvious. Sometimes, however, somebody makes a mistake that only becomes clear if it’s seen in a certain light. In this case, something perfectly innocent can quickly become an international laughing stock. It’s tragic, but such is the price for posting on the internet.
Unfortunately for Twitterer @robertaaarocha, she got to experience this cruel reality of social media first hand. In the early hours of October 1st, she shared a photo to her profile, featuring an intricately plaited new hair-do.
With a series of carefully constructed criss-crossed weaves and knots, it wouldn’t have looked out of place at Legolas’ Christmas party. There was just one problem. It looked like a giant, super-veiny penis.
The resemblance was quickly seized upon by writer Stephanie Yeboah, who wrote, “I must be tired because I thought this was the throbbiest of penises.”
She wasn’t alone. @LM_Rebirth hypothesised about the conversation that must have taken place in the salon, writing, “Hair dresser: What can I do for you today? Lady: I’d like an illusion of a dick. Hair dresser: Say no more.”
It might look elaborate, but once you’ve seen it, it’s impossible to picture anything other than a luminous unicorn penis.
The uncanny resemblance to something Jonah Hill might have drawn in Michael Cera’s school book in Superbad soon had the entire internet sniggering.
One Portuguese responder wrote rather unequivocally, “Your head looks like a cock without a lid,” while another declared it “a dildo designed by H.R Giger,” the man behind the famously phallic xenomorph from Alien.
It might have been created with the best intentions, but there’s no doubt that it will be impossible to think of @robertaaarocha without picturing penis hair. It just shows the value of getting a second opinion. You never know when you might be looking like a d*ck.
